What did Tom get when he locked Jerry in the freezer? Mice cubes!
My Roomba accidentally rolled out of my front door, and the neighborhood squirrels and rabbits immediately started attacking it.
Nature abhors a vacuum.
What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Koka-Koala.
Where do wasps go on holiday?
Stingapore.
The truck load of tortoise that crushed caused a turtle disaster.
What's the difference between a strawberry and a Tyrannosaurus? The strawberry is red!
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
Why doesn’t an owl study for a test?
They prefer to wing it.
What would a winged horse play in a band?
The pegabass guitar.
What mouse was a Roman emperor? Julius Cheeser!
What do jellyfish and a girl after prom night have in common?
They can't be deboned.
People always talk about the 'Eye Of The Tiger'. No one talks about the other four letters.
For waterproofing their nests, crows buy caw-king.
What will you get if you cross an ice bear and a running tiger? Frostbite.
What is a bat’s favorite dessert?
Pineapple upside-down cake.
Why don’t bats sleep like the rest of us?
They can't get the hang of it.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because there was a quack in the sidewalk.
If a young goat learns a martial art, are they a karate kid?
Why did the turkey NOT cross the road?
To prove that he wasn't chicken.
What do dogs and Santa have in common?
They are both seen Dachshund through the snow.
What mouse was a Roman emperor?
Julius Cheeser!
I have a flamingo friend who has a fantastic imagination, but they are always indulging in flights of fancy.
What do sharks order at McDonalds?
A quarter flounder.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
My wife tried to claim she was a night owl.
She was lying though, because when I tried to turn her head through 270 degrees, her neck snapped.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
What is the most affordable type of meat that we would purchase?
“Dear balls because they are always under a buck.”
What does a skunk’s car run on?
Fumes.
Why do mice need oiling?
Because they squeak!
What did the cow who barged the other cow say?
Moo-ve!
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
The baby beaver sang a song about the river in a video for his friends. He had a good flow.
Where does the Easter bunny get his eggs? From an eggplant.
Why did they take Polly away?
He went crackers!
What problem did the young bat experience?
The hangout.
A crow’s favorite nutty dessert is Pecawn Pie.
Why are cats scared of trees?
Because of their bark.
Did you hear about the two silkworms that were in a race? They wound up in a tie.
What type of ice cream do fish like to eat?
Shark-o-late!
Where did the deer go to fix its tail?
The re-tail shop.
What does the mouse say to its mate? "Were like crackers and cheese"
I really like the Lion King
and every day the urge to sing one of the songs is just a whim away, a whim away, a whim away.
Whale, whale, whale…
If it isn’t a pod.
How can you tell the difference between an English and French crow?
"PourCUAWWW! PourCUAWWW!"
What do you call a poor ant?
A peas-ant.
What do you call an ant who can’t speak?
A mute ant.
Why did the duck detective get the key to the city?
Because he quacked the case.
The baby crow decided to dress up as his favorite vegetable on Halloween, he dressed up as a caw-liflower.
What did the ghost say to the bee
“BOOBEE”
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