What do you get when you cross an alligator and a poison frog?
A croakadile.
What do you get if you try to cross a mouse with a skunk? Dirty looks from the mouse!
What is a flamingo's favorite ride at a theme park? The flamingo-karts.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which? Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
What is a snake’s favorite subject in school?
Hisstory.
What did the woodworm say to the chair?
It's been nice gnawing you.
Don’t wait on me to start the meeting. I might be a hare late.
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Whats in a camels favorite cup of tea?
Camelmile
What's as big as a dinosaur but weighs nothing? Her shadow!
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
I was milking a cow and a fly flew in its ear.
I thought, that’s weird, I just kept milking. A while later, the same fly showed up in the milk bucket. I guess that’s what they say: in one ear, out the udder.
What was the dog’s favorite book?
Winnie the Pooch. He loves to read a lot of story tails before bed.
What do you call an ant who likes to be alone?
Independ-ant.
What is an owl’s dream occupation?
Flight attendant.
We did not understand what the mother turtle was saying because it was all in ridleys.
Did you hear about the guy who killed a group of catholic crows?
It was Mass murder
Where do sharks go on vacation?
Fin-land.
here do lobsters go to borrow money? The prawn broker.
What do you call a goat who paints pictures?
Vincent Van Goat.
How does an antisocial crow say about a family party? "It was murder".
Why was the little bee sent to bed without supper?
Because he wouldn't beehive.
What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
The elephantom of the opera.
I painted my dog’s nails So he can look paw-ty.
What do you get if cross a frog with some mist?
Kermit the Fog.
Turtles communicate with each other through shell phones.
Where does a lobster keep its clothes?
In the clawset!
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What does an owl need after having a bath?
A t-owl.
Why do beavers make the best neighbors?
Because they mind their own dam business.
What sound do 8 sheep make?
Octo-bah.
The mossbacks could not connect with the new developments, so the bill was hot
down at the senate.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
Crows love Cawnie Chung, their favorite reporter.
What is a giraffe’s favorite fruit?
Necktarines.
It may seem a bit corny but we appreciate you working your tail off for us.
What did the grape say when the Koala stood on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
A zoo owner introduced his tiger to the visitors by saying "this is the most paw-some tiger at the zoo".
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
What do a dog and a cell phone have in common?
They both have collar ID.
What’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a crab with boobs?
One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean.
Why wouldn’t anyone play with the little longhorn?
He was too much of a bully.
Making puns ha?
Toucan play that game.
What do you call dogs who pay in the snow?
Slush puppies.
What do you call Spider-Man at his full potential
Petest Parkest.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
What do you call a fight between squirrels?
A squarrel
What do you call an illegally parked frog?
Toad.
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