What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Pig…
Pig who?
Pig on someone your own size!
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What’s the first line of the pig bible? “In the bacon-ing…”
What’s the one book all piglets read in grade school? A Series of Un-porcine-ite Events.
What did the pig say to his friend who had been cheated upon?
Please don't go bacon this relationship.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
Why did the pig go to the casino?
To play the slop machine!
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus?
A porky-pine.
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
Pork rinds.
I read a story about pig anatomy.
It was all straightforward until I found a twist in the tale.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
Why couldn’t the pig tie his shoelaces? He was too ham-fisted.
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
What’s a pig’s favorite holiday? Ar-boar Day.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman?
The Man of Squeal.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”.
Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day?
They threw a sowprize party.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
What do you call a pig who can’t mind his own business?
A nosey porker!
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
Jurassic Pork.
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
If you want to name a smart pig, name him Cunningham.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment.
How do pigs greet their family and friends?
With hogs and kisses.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
Bacon and Legs.
Why should you never share a bed with a pig? They hog all the covers.
What do you call a guinea pig that has become a member of the mafia?
A hamster
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
What do you call it when a pig loses its memory? Hamnesia.
Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
Why was the piglet whining.
He was boared out of his brains.
What does an obstinate piglet always say to his mama?
“Sow what?”
In the 5th month of every year, my aunt lets her pigs in the field…
It’s mayham!
What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose?
Ham boogers.
How does a 20-something pig hit on someone?
They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
When the pig had a quarrel with his wife, he ended up having a gilt trip.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
Why was the pig given a red card at the football game?
For playing dirty.
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