Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree on me.
It was a hambush.
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
How do pigs get to the hospital?
In ham-bulances.
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work?
Philanthropig
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
What did the pig exclaim when the wolf grabbed its tail?
“That’s the end of me!”
Why should you never rob a bank with a pig?
They always squeal.
What are pigs celebrating when they celebrate their birthday? The day they were boar-n.
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
What do you call a cold, angry pig? A ham-brr-grr.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus?
A porky-pine.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
How does a 20-something pig hit on someone?
They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating?
They’re in a stable relationship.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”.
There was so much crackling on the line, I thought a pig was disturbing the phone.
One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
What do you call a guinea pig that has become a member of the mafia?
A hamster
What’s the one way you should never greet a male pig? “Sow, what’s up?”
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
Pork rinds.
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
Why was the piglet whining.
He was boared out of his brains.
What’s the first line of the pig bible? “In the bacon-ing…”
What do you call it when a pig loses its memory? Hamnesia.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
What do you call a glass of alcoholic pig’s blood? Swine.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Pig…
Pig who?
Pig on someone your own size!
What kind of work do pigs do after school?
Hamwork.
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
When pigs live high on the hog, they run the risk of going into hock.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs
Why was the pig crying? Because he was boar-ed to tears.
What do pigs learn in the army? Ham to ham combat.
When the pig had a quarrel with his wife, he ended up having a gilt trip.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day?
“I’m bacon.”
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A slow-pork.
What do you call a pig who can’t mind his own business?
A nosey porker!
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
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