What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
What does a magician penguin say?
“Pick a cod, any cod…”
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
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