Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
Why are there no penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
Where do penguins keep their money?
In a snow bank!
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
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