Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
What do you call a kangaroo sanctuary?
A kazoo.
What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What’s something a kangaroo has that no other animal has?
Baby kangaroos.
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What do stylish kangaroos wear?
Jumpsuits.
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
What do you get when you combine a kangaroo with a donkey?
A Kick-Ass
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite year?
A leap year.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
Why are kangaroos good at brewing beer?
They have hops.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo? Hop on!
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch
What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?
Gross.
What animal jumps when it walks and sits when it stands?
A kangaroo.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite candy?
Lollihops.
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
Why don’t kangaroos make good sailors?
Because they’re always jumping ship.
What do you call a liquid kangaroo?
Marsoupial.
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