What do you call a talking kangaroo?
A quantum leap.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a cow?
A kanga-moo.
Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days?
Because then the kids have to play indoors.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite drink?
A juice pouch.
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
He didn’t want to jump to a conclusion.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
Did you hear about the scared kangaroo?
Yeah, he was a bit jumpy.
What did the kangaroo say while volunteering at the homeless shelter?
More-soup-y’all?
Kangaroo: [dials 9-1-1] I can’t find my kids!
9-1-1: Did you check your pockets?
Kangaroo: [pats pouch] Oh… nevermind.
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
What do you call an irate kangaroo?
A k-angry-oo.
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
What do you call a kangaroo that asks for seconds on ramen?
A more-soupial
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
A spider, a snake, and a kangaroo walk into a bar…
It’s a normal day in Australia.
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch
I saw a really cool kangaroo the other day
It had a hip hop
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
What do you call an angry kangaroo?
Hopping mad.
What do you call twin baby kangaroos?
Roo-mMates!
Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
What do you call a kangaroo DJ?
Disc joey.
I just had a pint of kangaroo beer
It was a bit too hoppy for me
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
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