What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
Why did the pony turn himself in?
He felt rem-horse.
Why do horses make good lawyers?
Attention to de-tail.
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
How do mares keep track of their boyfriends?
A stud book.
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
What was the horse’s best ballroom dance? The Foxtrot.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
Why are horses so good at the shooting range?
They’re hunters.
Black Beauty - Now there's a dark horse.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
What did the teenage horse say when her phone broke?
I canter even.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
How did the ponies stay in touch?
C-horse-pondence.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
Why was the horse a great editor?
She was very thorough bred.
How does a horse drink wine?
With a de-canter.
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
What do horses eat with their salad? Dressage-ing.
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
How do baby horses get tucked in at night?
They get told a tail.
Why did the horse never get cold?
It was a Dutch warmblood.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What's a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
Why was the horse feeling a bit sick?
Its voice was a bit hoarse.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
What kind of car do fancy horses drive?
Mustangs.
How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field?
They horse-boo.
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses?
Bronchitis.