What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
What did the deer say when she wanted to be left alone?
“Doe away!”
Q. Which deer prison is escape proof?
A. Elk-atraz.
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
What do we call a deer without any eye?
“No – eye – deer.”
What did the disappointed deer say? Oh deer!
What do you call a deer wearing an explosive vest?
Bombi.
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
What did the deer write in his journal every day? Deer diary.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
Q. Will a sensible stag do something dangerous to impress a doe?
A. No, not even on a deer.
What did the deer say to his funny friend? You’re deer-larious!
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
What did the fawn say to warn her friend about the haunted house?
“Don’t go deer!”
Q. Which doe did all the stags and bucks sing about in the 1960s?
A. Deer Prudence.
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
What did the married deer couple say to each other? I love you deer-ly!
What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
Truth-or-deer.
What do teenage deer do at slumber parties?
Truth or deer.
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
Where do Santa Claus and his deers stop to have a coffee at Christmas?
“Star – Bucks!”
Q. What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
What was the motto of the unique deer? Deer to be different!
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elka Seltzer.
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
What is the name of Santa’s rudest deer?
Rude-olph.
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
Q. What did the witch get when she crossed a doe with a tornado?
A. A whirling deer-vish.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
Q. What can a buck take after a night of drinking at a stag party?
A. Elk-a-seltzer.
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.