Why wouldn’t anyone play with the little longhorn?
He was too much of a bully.
What has four legs and goes Oom, Oom?
A cow walking backwards.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
I warned farmer Brown not to pamper that cow too much because it would wind up giving spoiled milk.
What would you hear at a cow concert?
Moo-sic.
Where do cows go on vacation?
Moo York.
Cows wear bells around their necks because it is moooo-sic to the farmer’s ears.
The story of the chicken and cow running away together sounds like a cock and bull story to me.
Why do cows think cooks are mean?
They whip cream.
What is it when one cow spies on another cow?
A steak out.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
Why was the cow always exercising? To build up its moo-scles
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
He wanted rich milk.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
Angry cows are usually responsible for giving the farmer sour milk.
Cows will never make the police force because they simply refuse to go on steak-outs.
What South American dance do cows like to do?
The Rump-a.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
What does a cow put on his French toast?
Moooolasses.
What do you get when you cross a cow with a wolf?
An animal that mooed at the full moon.
What is the definition of “moon”?
The past tense of “moo”.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because the cows have horns.
How do you count cows?
With a cowculator.
What do you get if you cross Bossy with a vampire?
Dracowla.
The manager for that dairy farm was referred to as the cow-ordinator.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
The farmer called his prize cow a bull-dozer because she was always sound asleep in the fields.
What do cows sing at their friend’s birthday parties?
“Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo!"
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
What did the cow who barged the other cow say?
Moo-ve!
That romantic cow took his new girlfriend to the moo-vies.
What does a cow ride when his car is broken?
A COW-asaki MOO-torcycle.
How did the calf’s final exam turn out?
Grade A.
What’s the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper.
You can always find the little cows eating lunch inside the calf-etiria.
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
What do cows do when they’re introduced?
They give each other a milk shake.
What do you call an Arab next to a cow?
Milk Sheikh.
What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?
Cowboom.
What do cows do for entertainment?
They rent moovies!
Where do cows get together?
The meet market.
The reason you will see all the cows lie down when it starts to rain is because they want to keep each
udder dry.
Where do pigs learn about magic?
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
The reason the cow wore a bell around her neck was because her horn didn’t work anymore.
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
The Secret Service surround the President with twelve cows because they were attempting to beef up their security.