I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
Which day of the week do chickens hate most?
Fry-Day.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
How does a chicken mail a letter to her friend?
In a HEN-velope!
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What kind of tree does a chicken come from?
A poul-tree.
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
What do you call a crazy chicken?
A cuckoo cluck.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
What do you call the door to a chicken barn?
The hen-trance.
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