What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
How is cat food sold? Usually, purr can!
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
Which state of America has lots of cats and dogs? Petsylvania
My husband was allergic to my cat so I knew I had to get rid of him… so I’m looking to rehome Gerry, he’s thirty-five and works in accounting!
What do you call a cat that has a hundred legs? A cat-erpillar.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
Why couldn’t the cat read a book? He was il-litter-ate!
What is a cat’s favorite book? The Princess and the Paw-per.
What did the cat say when it saw something scary? That freaks meowt!
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
Dogs can’t operate an MRI machine… but catscan.
What did the mom say to her kitten when she caught him slouching? Paw attention to your paw-sture!
What is a cat’s favorite class at school? Hiss-tory!
There is a rule that cats can shed hair on anything in the house… It is called fur-niture for a reason!
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
What did the confused cat say? I’m purr-plexed!
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs.
Did you hear about the cat who drank ten bowls of water? It set a new lap record
What did the happy cat say? Stay paw-sitive!
What kind of cats love to go bowling? Alley cats!
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What do cats read in the morning? The mewspaper!
What do you use to brush a dead cat? A catacomb!
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
Why couldn’t the old cat see? He suffered from car-aracts
Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
For kitty littering.
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
Did you hear about the cat that ate a ball of yarn? She had a litter of mittens.
What is a cat’s favorite type of water? Purr-ified!
If there were ten cats in a boat and one jumped out, how many would be left? None, because they were all copycats!
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic.
What did the happy kitten say? I’m feline good!
What happened when the kitten turned one? She had a birthday paw-ty.
What is a cat’s favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse!
What is a cat’s favorite Tom Hanks character? Furrest Gump.
What is a cat’s favorite type of bird? An e-mew!
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
What does a cat wear to stop smelling? Antipurrspirant!
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
Where do cats go when they lose their tail? A re-tail store!
What sport does a cat play? Hairball!
What are the cat police called? The claw Enforcement.
What is a cat’s favorite horror movie? The Purrrge!
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