Why did the spider crawl up the elephants leg the second time?
It got pissed off the first time.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your start getting it ready Fridae and Saturdae!
What’s the difference between a crow and a chicken?
A chicken can crow, but a crow can’t chicken.
Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?
Because it takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
What do you can an ant scientist?
Albert Antstein.
Why didn’t the koala bear get the job? He was underkoalafied. How did he fix this? By going back to koalage.
Did you hear about the mother goat telling jokes?
She’s a real kidder.
What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
What do you call a bee that comes back from the dead?
Zombee
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
What do you call a freezing bear?
A brrrrrrr.
What do you get if you cross a pelican and zebra? Two streets further away.
What do you call two octopuses that look alike?
I-tentacle twins!
How can you tell where the Easter Bunny has been? Eggs mark the spot.
An arrogant gazelle walks up to a bunch of lions and tells them how much better he is than them.
He was consumed by pride.
What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
What do you call a cold, angry pig? A ham-brr-grr.
What’s an orca’s favorite TV show?
Whale Of Fortune.
What did the duck eat for snack?
Salted Quackers.
Beavers are the best at getting things done on riverbanks. They have their own waves of working.
Why should you never rob a bank with a pig?
They always squeal.
What is a koala’s favorite type of fruit? Bearies.
What do you call an ant that doesn’t get warm?
Coolant.
What happened when the Easter Bunny met the rabbit of his dreams? They lived hoppily ever after.
Why did the monkey like the banana?
Because it had appeal.
What kind of underwear do monkeys wear?
Chimpantsies.
What did the worm say to the other when he was late home? Where in earth have you been.
What kind of photos do turtles take?
Shell-fies.
What do you call a flying elephant?
A jumbo jet.
What did the kangaroo say about the man who kidnapped her joey?
Stop that pick-pocket!
What's a bee's favorite novel?
The Great Gats-Bee
What do you call a gorilla in a cement-mixer?
King Koncrete.
What do dinosaurs have that no other animals have? Baby Dinosaurs.
My pet raven, Poe, started coughing... thought it was Corvid-19, but then the bird flu away. Think I will see him nevermore.
We did not understand what the mother turtle was saying because it was all in ridleys.
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
I went to the Chinese buffet on crab leg night and ate my fill, but they kicked me out.
They said I was being too shellfish.
A lobster's favorite shot in tennis?
The lob.
What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A civil serpent.
What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?
A gangaroo.
I got an email today saying I could win $10,000 in a fishing competition.
But I'm sure there's a catch involved somewhere.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus?
A porky-pine.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
Did you hear about the short-sighted frog?
He had to go to the Hopthalmologist.
Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks
Why don't dinosaurs ever forget? Because no one ever tells them anything!
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
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