What type of snake does a baby play with?
A rattlesnake.
Escaped snakes make some people hiss-terical.
I tried asking some beavers to help me build my house. They didn’t give a dam.
What do rabbits say before they eat? Lettuce pray.
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff.
Baa dum tssssss.
What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day? God save the kin.
What did the squirrel say to its baby before it had to leave?
I'm gonna go out on a limb here.
What do bees chew?
Bubmble gum.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
I once had a conversation with a dolphin.
We just clicked.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a Spider? A Hare net!
My pet owl will soon turn 180.
He's not old, he just has a bad neck.
Why was the whale so sad?
The fish was said because he was a Blue whale!
Why did the beaver cross the river? To get to the other side of the river.
What sits in a tree and says "Hoots mon, hoots mon?"
A Scottish owl.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
How do llamas say “Merry Christmas” in Spanish?
Fleece Navidad.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
What do you get when you mix a sheep and a kangaroo
A wooly jumper
What did the jockey respond when someone asked to ride his horse?
“Dis-mount is mine.”
What did the Easter Bunny say to its partner? We make one egg-celllent couple.
What did the bat say to the friend who itched and squirmined?
Come back when you have washed out the virmin.
What is a dog’s favorite type of homework?
A lab report.
What is a bear’s favorite dessert?
Blue beary pie.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What did the mama turkey say to her naughty son? If your papa could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!
Where do beavers keep their money? Well, they keep it in the riverbank.
What do you call a flying turtle?
A shellicopter.
What is a Leatherback Sea Turtles favorite sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish.
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
What do you call a otter that can pick up an elephant ? Sir!
Why did the ram run over the cliff edge?
Because he didn’t see the ewe turn.
What do rodents say when they play bingo?
‘Eyes down for a full mouse’!
Grandma runs the kitchen like a turtle-tarian; give her some space there.
If a four-legged animal a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped, what’s a tiger?
Stri-ped.
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
There is nothing impaws-sible if you’re as brave as a tiger!
Why did the bunny eat the wedding ring? Because he heard it was 18 carrots.
I went to the zoo today....
only to find out that some aquatic mammals had escaped.
It was otter chaos.
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
What would you call a dream where a koala bear is eating you? A bite-mare.
What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A civil serpent.
What is a koala bear’s favorite line in the movie “The Sixth Sense”? “Aussie dead people.”
What is an Italian’s favorite type of dog?
A ciao ciao.
Which type of dinosaur could jump higher than a house ? Any kind! A house cannot jump!
What’s striped and bouncy?
A tiger on a pogo stick!
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
Who did the goats vote for as president?
Billy Clinton.
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