How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
Are Jellyfish sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish?
What do you call a flying monkey?
A hot air baboon.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
If a lamb and tiger were crossed, you would end up with a striped sweater.
I tried riding a camel instead of a horse once.
It had its ups and downs.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopis
Why did the turkey cross the road? It was the chicken's day off!
What was the turkey suspected of? Fowl play.
A muslim woman wanted to adopt a gorilla. Her husband wouldn't allow it.
He said, that's haram, bae.
Did you hear about the kangaroo with glasses?
He had to go to the hopthalmologist.
Why did the bunny build herself a new house? She was fed up with the hole thing!
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
Why do squirrels swim on their backs?
To keep their nuts dry.
The tiger asked his longtime friend, "Will you be my tigerlfriend."
What is the most expensive kind of fish?
The goldfish.
I can’t believe that during the attempted murder, John Crow, Russel Crow and Sheryl Crow were all in the room.
How do you make an Octopus laugh?
With tentacles!
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
Why cant a mosquito stand on his feet?
because they dont have mosquiTOES.
Flamingo parents are really cute with their babies. You should see them playing Beak a Boo.
How do you know carrots are good for your eyes? Because you never see a rabbit wearing glasses.
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
What do you say if you meet a toad?
Wart's new?
I’m putting an official ban on rabbit puns. They are not bunny anymore.
Why did the firefighters bring a dog along with them?
To help them find the nearest fire hydrant.
Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Because they wouldn't take a bath!
Accidentally ran over a French seal today .
Phoque.
What do you get if you cross Bossy with a vampire?
Dracowla.
My girlfriend and I saw an inflatable gorilla In front of a jacuzzi store
She asked me why they would do that for a jacuzzi store. I told her it was a guerilla tactic. She was not impressed.
What do you get when you cross a snake and a plane?
A Boeing constrictor.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Why are owls so good at math?
They excel at owlgebra.
What does a bookworm do during a baseball game? Worm the bench.
Why did the panda’s joke suck?
It was unbearable.
What do you call an otter with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
I saw a squirrel throw up today! It was nuts!
What do you call a holy squirrel?
A chipmunk.
Why are alligators long and green?
Because if they were small and red, they would be tomatoes.
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
Why are horses so good at the shooting range?
They’re hunters.
What do you call a happy rabbit? An Hop-timist.
Heard about the devoted beaver who crossed the turbulent river? He took a leap of faith!
What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.
Why did the bear quit his job at the daycare center?
It was panda-monium.
What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars ? Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
Q. After the stripper is done, what happens at a stag party?
A. Deer-ty dancing.
Some pink birds can be really rude. I approached a group of them the other day and they screamed “Flamingo away!”
In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated? Turkey.
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