What does a koala do before making any kind of appointment? He always checks his koalander.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
It is said that crows and owls are in caw-hoots.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
Why did the elephant start the stampede?
Because it wanted to be herd.
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
What did the beaver say when it saw it's home on fire?
Hot Dam!
What does Spider-man become when he joins the circus?
an aracnobat.
How do you say farewell to a very optimistic insect?
Buoyant!
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
What do you get when you put a bomb in a dinosaur? Dino-mite.
What's a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use honeycombs.
Why does the dolphin kingdom never go to war?
Because it would defeat the porpoise.
Why should you never do math with a tiger?
If you add 4+4 you're gonna get ate.
How do you write a book about bats? With a ghostwriter.
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
That alligator took great photos, he was a bit of a snapper.
What kind of music do frogs listen to?
Hip hop.
Do you know what a beavers' favorite snack is? Wood chips.
What do you call an and with frogs legs?
An antphibian.
The turtle had to cross the road in order to get to the Shell station.
I had a shell of a time when I attended the costume party as a turtle.
Which flower is known as the most ferocious flower? A tiger lily.
Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?
Because they’re kan-gurus.
When a dinosaur gets a goal in a soccer tournament, it is known as a dino-score.
Do you think you know more parrot jokes than me? Toucan play that game!
How did the little koala bear stop the movie? She hit the paws button.
All seals live at the same elevation
Seal level.
I just got an adorable baby goat, but it can’t bend its legs.
The vet said it’s a cute kid knee disorder.
Did you hear about the sheep's jousting tournament?
It was a real baa-lancing act.
My dog takes so long to get ready. He can never chews what to wear.
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
What do you call a shark that can’t stop singing “U Cant Touch This?”
An M.C. Hammerhead.
A magician once said he could make a tiger disappear but only transformed it into a tabby cat...
It was a sleight exaggeration.
Whichever gator stole all the food, we'll catch the crook-a-dile.
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
What do you do if you find a black mamba in your toilet?
Wait until he’s finished.
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.
Some marine biologists argued about how best to handle angry dolphins.
The were working at cross porpoises.
What does Harry Potter use when sealing packages?
His Parceltongue.
How do beavers make a bouncy dam? Well, they use spring water.
Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
He didn’t want to jump to a conclusion.
Q. Who walks around the suburbs trying to sell venison meat?
A. A deer-to-door salesmant.
The tiger asked his longtime friend, "Will you be my tigerlfriend."
What do you get if you cross a whale with an elephant?
A submarine with a built-in snorkel.
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
People always talk about the 'Eye Of The Tiger'. No one talks about the other four letters.
I’m putting an official ban on rabbit puns. They are not bunny anymore.
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