Why do dinosaurs eat their food raw? Cause they don't know how to cook
How does a dog stop a TV show?
He presses paws.
What kind of camel throws a hissy fit when you milk it?
A drama dairy.
What bee is most indecisive?
A May bee!
I am an introvert, but you know how to bring me out of my shell.
What do you call a cat that gets what they want? Purr-suasive.
Q. Why was the gorilla's jungle party so lame?
A. Because theyran out of chimps and dip.
When should you stop for a glow worm? When he has a red light.
What do you get when you cross an owl with an oyster?
Pearls of wisdom.
Have you ever seen a catfish? No, how did he hold the rod and reel?
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a Spider? A Hare net!
A flamingo can be a really good friend to have. However, they generally fit the bill really well.
Why couldn't anyone see the flamingo? It was in de skies.
The local zoo just started a recycling collection program to support its mission: 'When you bring in one can, you can save Toucans.'
Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account?
They were prime mates.
A priest, a rabbit and a deacon walk into a blood bank.
"I think I might be a type o." said the rabbit.
Why could not the young vampire bat play baseball?
He was a bat boy.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
Why did the bunny say to the duck? You quack me up!
I whisper my sins to crows
So my parents can't hear me confess to a murder
What did the woodworm say to the chair?
It's been nice gnawing you.
Why wasn’t the giraffe invited to the party?
He was a pain in the neck.
What do you call an electrically charged seal?
A seal ion.
I was she-shocked when my pet turtle died.
What do you call it when a giraffe swallows a toy jet?
A plane in the neck.
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
A Zebra said to a Lion “Let’s swap roles for a while."
The Lion said “ I’m game!”.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
Why did the mouse eat a candle? For some light refreshment!
When a lion takes a lioness from another lion, he kills and eats any cubs she has. You'd think he'd be ashamed of himself.
But apparently he just swallows his pride.
All prominent werewolf movies are produced in howl-lywood.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
I heard someone broke out of prison using a sheep
I didn’t believe it until I saw the news and he was on the lamb.
What do you call a super articulate dinosaur?
A Thesaurus.
Some people like to play croc-quet.
Why did the dog fail his driving test?
Because he couldn’t parallel bark.
I got in a fight with a crab yesterday.
When I punched him he ran, goon.
What does a Triceratops sit on? Its Tricera-bottom.
Why is it so difficult to sell a toy zebra.
You can never find the barcode.
What do you call a parrot with an umbrella? Polly unsaturated.
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
How was the first giraffe made?
Chuck Norris uppercut a horse.
What has a spiked tail, plates on its back, and sixteen wheels? A Stegosaurus on roller skates!
Q. How do you describe a stinking filthy buck?
A. Deer-ty.
Why did the duck go to the bank?
Because he wanted to get a new bill.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
What do gorillas and orangutans wear in the kitchen?
Ape-rons.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because the chicken joke wasn't invented yet.
Angry cows are usually responsible for giving the farmer sour milk.
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