What's a frog's favorite flower?
A croakus.
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn’t work.
A saber tooth tiger would never blow anything up.
But a dino might.
What do you call an ant from overseas?
Import-ant.
When doing laundry, the mother wolf accidentally fell into the washing machine. It became a wash and wearwolf.
How do you know if a tiger is male or female?
Throw a rock at it. If he runs it's a male. If she runs it's a female.
How do the crows in Texas greet each other?
Yee-caw
Angry cows are usually responsible for giving the farmer sour milk.
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
What kind of music do goats listen to?
Baaa-ch!
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because all his uncles were ants.
What do llamas always say when they introduce themselves?
“Fleeced to meet you.”
I hate worms and snakes because they have no feet.
You might say that I am lacktoes intolerant.
Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?
It ended in a tie.
How do worms measure their length?
They ask a tape worm to help out!
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
Where do bats like to relax?
In the bat-tub.
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
What does the mouse say to its mate? "Were like crackers and cheese"
Why did the Apatosaurus devour the factory? Because she was a plant eater!
What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
What do sharks order at McDonalds?
A quarter flounder.
What's a camel's favorite part of a meal?
Desert!
Why isn't the the koala a real bear? He doesn't have the right koalifications.
Did you hear about the croc and rooster that had a kid together?
It was a crocadoodledoo.
Two flies were fighting on a toilet seat.
One got pissed.
How do snails make important calls? On shell phones.
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
Why are bunnies always tired in April? Because they just finished a March.
I saw a guy trying to cross a really busy street. Trying to be helpful, I said, “You know, there is a zebra crossing 50ft ahead.”
He said, “I hope he’s having a better luck than I am.”
What did the snail say to the other who had hit him and run off? I'll get you next slime!
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
What do dinosaurs have that no other animals have? Baby Dinosaurs.
Because they got turtle recall, turtles never forget.
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
Who is a beaver's most favorite pop singer ever? Justin Beaver.
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
How do you make a pig really happy on his birthday? Throw him a sow-prize party.
What planet does a seal live on?
EARFFF EARFFF EARFFFF.
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
Why can't you take a turkey to church? They use FOWL language.
What is white and has long ears, whiskers, and sixteen wheels? Two rabbits on Rollerblades!
What do you call a greedy ant?
An anteater.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
I killed a spider with soap
He got a clean death.
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
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