What type of tool does a prehistoric reptile carpenter use? A dino-saw. Who makes the best prehistoric reptile clothes ? A dino-sewer.
Why don’t bears eat fast food?
Because it’s hard for them to catch.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
What happened when the tiger ate the comedian?
He felt funny!
Why did the elephant ask to borrow a suitcase?
Because he only had a little trunk.
What side does the zebra have the most stripes on?
The outside.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
I am an introvert, but you know how to bring me out of my shell.
What’s a shark’s favorite movie?
The Shaw-shark Redemption.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
My wife was describing the pair of Toucans the zoo recently acquired.
I responded "You mean a four-can?"
What did the teenage crow want for his birthday? A brand new caw!
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
An elephant's opinion carries a lot of weight.
The weather's getting colder, I really fancy some hot croc-o-late.
Why did the shark spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny.
Why did the chick disappoint his mother?
He wasn’t what he was cracked up to be.
What did Mama pig ask her kids every day after school?
“Hoofeels hungry?”
What do you call a bee that lives in a mud hive?
An adobee!
What did the deer say to her friend when she needed assistance?
“Could you doe me a favour?”
What did the banana do when he saw the monkey?
The banana split.
What did the lollipop lady say to the zebra crossing?
'You're stripping me of a job.'
I went to the zoo today....
only to find out that some aquatic mammals had escaped.
It was otter chaos.
What goes dot-dot-croak, dot-dash-croak?
Morse toad.
What do you call a turtle chef?
A slow cooker.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
What's the best way to talk to a Tyrannosaur ? Long distance!
What did the dolphin say to its friend who wouldn’t stop lying?
Stop spouting nonsense!
A bunch of crows ganged up and killed a chicken.
It was a murder most fowl.
Why did the koala get fired from his job?
Because he would only do the bear minimum.
Why did the beaver refuse to laugh at any of the twig's jokes? He is not a big fan of dry humor.
My zebra is a rubbish ballet dancer. I think he’s got two left feet.
What do you call vampires bats that cheer at football games?
Bat-on-twirlers.
What do you get if you try to cross a mouse with a skunk? Dirty looks from the mouse!
What did the snail say to the other who had hit him and run off? I'll get you next slime!
I started dating a girl I really like. She's really into bees.
I think she's a keeper
What do you call a goat who is in charge of a university?
Billy Dean.
Why are Dalmatians so bad at hiding?
Because they are always spotted.
Why do pandas like old movies?
Because they’re in black and white.
What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Koka-Koala.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
How do you save a drowning mouse ?
Use mouse to mouse resuscitation !
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
The zookeeper was struggling to explain why two tropical birds were stuck together.
It was toucan fusing.
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
Why do ants work so hard?
They are all serv-ants.
What does a tiger say to his friends before eating a meal? "Let us prey!"
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
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