Whats the preferred car of frogs?
The Beetle.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
What fish only swims at night?
A starfish.
What do koalas do when they’re facing a tough situation? They grin and bear it.
A teacher asks the class to name six mammals that you might find in Africa. One of the pupils replies, “five zebras and a lion”.
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
What did the baby rabbit say before his favorite holiday? I carrot wait for the Easter Bunny to visit.
The group of crows that attacked the lady was accused of murder, the cawps are still looking for the probable caws.
Why was the whale so sad?
The fish was said because he was a Blue whale!
My dog loves designer hand-bags.
So I got him a Poochi.
Which dinosaurs were the best policemen? Tricera-cops.
Which state of America has lots of cats and dogs? Petsylvania
Where do prehistoric reptiles like to go on vacation? To the dino-shore.
What do fish use to weigh themselves?
Scales!
What's green and dangerous?
A frog with a hand-grenade.
What does Pooh Bear call his girl friend?
Hunny.
What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth?
Hard cheese!
What Do You Call A Clever Duck?
A wise quacker
Top 25 Funniest Duck Names:
1. James Pond
2. Quack Sparrow
3. Duck Norris
4 Quacks-a-Lot
5 Quackhead
6 Quacko
7. Quackers
8. Nutquacker
9. Quacker Jack
10. Quack Efron
11. Quack Black
12. Moby Duck
13. Quackula
14. Sir Duckington
15. Eggbert
16. Quackers
17. Duckleberry Finn
18. Quacker Jack
19. Lucky Duck
20. Cheese and quackers
21. Quaker Jack
22. Duckingham Palace
23.Waddles
24. Quackie Chan
25 Firequacker
What do you call a dinosaur with a extensive vocabulary? a thesaurus.
Why do bees stay in the hive during the winter?
Swarm.
What did they Turkey say to the blade of grass? Nice knawing you!
Why don't crabs donate to charity?
They're shellfish penny pinchers.
Where do koalas go to settle legal matters? A kangaroo court!
What did the Mountain lion say to the bathroom attendant?
Out of the way, I’m about to Puma pants!
How do you catch a rich squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a cashew.
A flying turtle is called a shellicopter.
When you cross a wolf and a monkey, you end up with a howler monkey.
When you cross a sheep and a wolf, you will end up with a new sheep, you can’t make such a costly mistake with wolves.
Where does a Tyrannosaurus sit when he comes to stay? Anywhere he wants to.
What game do bats like to play with birds?
Bat-mington.
What did the dolphin say to its friend who wouldn’t stop lying?
Stop spouting nonsense!
What did the Inuit say to to Englishman After he wanted some seal?
"I've got Nunavut."
How do you save a drowning otter? Take your foot of its head
If you were in the jungle and a gorilla charged you, what should you do?
Pay him.
How did the tigers greet the other animals in the jungle? "Hey! Pleased to eat you."
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
What did the gorilla wear when he was cooking in the kitchen?
An ape-ron
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
What do you call writing a book about breeding bats to pull carriages? A wheely bat idea.
What do you call a giraffe winning a horse race?
A long shot.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
The tiger came went to the salon. Now, other animals of the jungle call him 'Shaved Khan.'
Why did the bunny bang his head on the piano? He was playing by ear!
Any time I wear a t shirt with a picture of a crocodile on it, I feel a little sick.
I think I might be Lacoste intolerant.
What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
The elephantom of the opera.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
What did the clean dog say to the dirty dog?
Long time no flea.
After graduating from high school, crows go to caw-lleges for further studies.
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