How do the cool camels say hello?
"How you dune?"
What do you call a poor ant?
A peas-ant.
What do you call a snake that informs the police?
A grass snake.
Why did the frog go to the bank with a gun?
He wanted to robbit.
What do you call a reptile that works on a farm?
An irri-gator.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
What do you get when you cross a chili pepper, a shovel and a terrier?
A hot-diggity-dog.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
What do you call a cold dog?
A pup-sicle. Better steer clear, especially if he’s fur-ocious… don’t want him to give you frost-bite.
Why was the mosquito sad on christmas?
It was a bah hum bug.
Llama know if you don’t like these puns and alpaca my suitcase and leave!
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
How does a dog stop a TV show?
He presses paws.
What did one crow say to the other after the party?
We were raven.
What do you call an alert ant?
Vigil-ant.
How Do Ducks Talk?
They don't, you quack.
How do you make a duck sing soul music?
Put him in the microwave until his Bill Withers
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
Accidentally ran over a French seal today .
Phoque.
What’s black and white and very noisy?
A panda with a set of drums.
Turtles communicate with each other through shell phones.
What was the most flexible dinosaur? Tyrannosaurus Flex.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
Q. Which kind of ape enjoys smoking tobaco?
A. Cigarilla.
What do sharks order at McDonalds?
A quarter flounder.
What is a cat’s favorite class at school? Hiss-tory!
What kind of underwear do monkeys wear?
Chimpantsies.
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn’t work.
How do you say farewell to a very optimistic insect?
Buoyant!
What’s a shark’s favorite movie?
The Shaw-shark Redemption.
What's green with red spots?
A frog with the chicken pox.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
What do you get when you cross a banker with a fish?
A loan shark
Most camels prefer camelmile drinks because of the nutrition in there.
Why do cows have no money?
Because farmers milk them dry.
What did the wife beaver say to her astronaut husband? You are otter this world.
What did the bacteria say to the bee to cheer it up?
Gram positive
Why do bears have sticky fur?
Because they use honey combs.
I told my parents I wanted to raise goats for a living, but I was only kidding.
What’s the difference between a fly and an eagle?
An eagle can fly but a fly cannot eagle.
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
What do you call a rabbit that has fleas?
Bugs bunny.
Why did the turkey NOT cross the road?
To prove that he wasn't chicken.
I went to a mosquito themed restaurant.
It wasn't very good, though. After a few bites I got up and left.
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
My wife and I are very competitive, but when it came to flamingo impersonation, I didn't stand a chance
She had a leg up the whole time.
Which dog won the race? A weiner dog.
What’s a gorilla’s favourite pop group? A: Bananarama!
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