What do crows take for their gut issues? crow-biotics.
What do you call a goat who paints pictures?
Vincent Van Goat.
What would you rather be, a polar bear or a little otter. A little (h)otter
Why won’t crocodiles attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy!
What do you get if you cross a bat with a woodpecker?
Bat-a-tat.
What did the scientist’s cat say? I think I’ve lost an electron, I’m pawsitive!
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch
What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday?
It’s roar birthday!
How many rabbits does it take to change a light bulb? Only one if it hops right to it.
My friend’s parrot lost his beak in a fan accident and he wanted to find a prosthetic. I sent him to my Uncle Tony.
He fits the bill.
What is the similarity between a male deer and a beaver? Both have buck teeth.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs.
You can catch a lot of flies with honey
But you'll catch more honeys being fly.
Crows, they just love sports, crow-quet to be precise.
What do drunk kangaroos play?
Hopscotch.
How do koalas stay in shape? They do bearobics.
How do pigs greet their family and friends?
With hogs and kisses.
What do you get when you cross a shark with a snowman?
Frostbite.
What kind of computer does a worm have? A Macintosh.
Did you hear about the rich rabbit? He was a millionhare!
Q: Why did the tiger cross the road?
A: To stop the zebra crossing.
What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him!
When a lion takes a lioness from another lion, he kills and eats any cubs she has. You'd think he'd be ashamed of himself.
But apparently he just swallows his pride.
The reason the cow wore a bell around her neck was because her horn didn’t work anymore.
What do you get when you cross a lion with a parrot?
I don't know, but when it talks, you better listen.
How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow? Down in the mouth.
What do you call a funny snake?
Hissssssterical.
Bee warned.
Bee puns really sting.
What does a dinosaur call a porcupine? A toothbrush.
Did you hear about the crab who went to a seafood disco?
He pulled a mussel.
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
What’s a dog’s favorite breakfast?
Woofles.
What is a frog's favorite time?
Leap year.
Police are investigating a string of homicides which have occurred over the last two weeks. The victims have identified as Cap'n Crunch, Toucan Sam, Tony the Tiger, and the latest victim, Lucky the Leprechaun.
They are looking for a cereal killer.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
What do you get if you cross a wasp with a doorbell?
A hum-dinger!
Why is it so difficult to sell a toy zebra.
You can never find the barcode.
Where do ants go on vacation?
Frants.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
How do you hold a bat?
By the wings.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What side does the zebra have the most stripes on?
The outside.
How do you make a panda?
Punch a polar bear in the eyes.
What do fish use to weigh themselves?
Scales!
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
What do you call a royal giraffe?
Your highness.
Beavers enjoy being in the company of a river because they go with the flow.
What did the Easter Bunny say to its partner? We make one egg-celllent couple.
Go to BabaMail
