What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
Truth-or-deer.
What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
Ant-ten-eye.
Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account?
They were prime mates.
If you ever own a koala as a pet, make sure you can keep track of it by putting a koalar around its neck.
I threw water on a flamingo the other day
Now it's just an O.
Have you seen the new movie with the Dachshund?
Apparently it’s an Oscar Weiner.
A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
What do you call a spider with ten eyes?
A spiiiiiiiiiider.
Q: How did the tiger perform during the show?
A: He was a roaring success.
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
Did you hear about the birds of prey on black Friday?
It was a free for owl.
What do you have to know to teach a bat tricks?
More than a bat.
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
Because they dropped out of the school.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
What do you get when you cross a turkey with a banjo? A turkey that can pluck itself!
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What did Shakespeare say when he was angry with his Dalmatian?
Out, out, damned spot.
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
If you have a line of 100 rabbits in a row and 99 of them take 1 step backwards, what do you have? A receding hare line.
I like dillos, but do not support giving them guns.
I would never armadillo.
Tony the tiger ate both of my grandmother's parents.
Tearfully, I asked him why. He just looked at me and said, "They're GREAT!"
What do you call an ant who won’t go away?
Perman-ant.
Why won't the dog listen to the farmer's sheep jokes?
He's herd them all.
Tigers are probably the most roarsome animal ever created!
Why did the cranberries turn red?
They saw the turkey dressing!
What do you call a lobster with a Christmas hat?
Santa Claws
How is a pig’s tail like 4 o’clock in the morning? It’s twirly.
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
How did the hammerhead do on his test?
He nailed it.
Why do giraffes have long necks?
Because their feet smell.
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
How did the koala bear get the high-paying job? He met all of the koalafications.
What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day? God save the kin.
How do you make a glow worm happy? Cut off his tail, he'll be de-lighted.
What do you call a polar bear in Florida?
A solar bear.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
What’s a goat’s favorite musical?
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dream Goat.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because all of the cows have horns
I felt so guilty after I stepped on a snail this morning. You should of seen him, he looked genuinely crushed.
When you cross a wolf and a monkey, you end up with a howler monkey.
Where do fish go to watch movies?
At the dive-in.
Why did the bunny bang his head on the piano? He was playing by ear!
What do you call an illegally parked frog?
Toad.
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman?
The Man of Squeal.
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
A priest, a rabbit and a deacon walk into a blood bank.
"I think I might be a type o." said the rabbit.
What kind of magic does a love-struck giraffe practice?
Neck-romance-y.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
How do you draw flies?
With a pencil!
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