What did the pig say to his friend who had been cheated upon?
Please don't go bacon this relationship.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
Q. What do swine use to chat up a date?
A. Pig-Up Lines!
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman?
The Man of Squeal.
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A slow-pork.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
A local farmer has trained his pigs to perform ballet.
I’m going to see their production of swine lake.
What do you call a pig who can’t mind his own business?
A nosey porker!
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him?
Filthy rich.
What does an obstinate piglet always say to his mama?
“Sow what?”
Why did the pig go to the casino?
To play the slop machine!
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What do you call a glass of alcoholic pig’s blood? Swine.
How do pigs write top secret messages?
With invisible oink!
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What do you call a cold, angry pig? A ham-brr-grr.
In the 5th month of every year, my aunt lets her pigs in the field…
It’s mayham!
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
What do you call a pig with three eyes?
A piiig!
Did you hear about the pig that ran the Post Office?
He was the first Porkmaster General.
Why was the piglet whining.
He was boared out of his brains.
What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
What do pigs learn in the army? Ham to ham combat.
Why was the pig crying? Because he was boar-ed to tears.
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
How do pigs get to the hospital?
In ham-bulances.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
How do pigs greet their family and friends?
With hogs and kisses.
Why should you never share a bed with a pig? They hog all the covers.
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