What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
Why do Penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they haven’t got any pockets.
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
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