Why did the pony turn himself in?
He felt rem-horse.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
Why did they stop giving the horse grass?
They wanted it to be less green.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
Why couldn’t the equestrian find the carrots? They were down by the bay.
How do mares keep track of their boyfriends?
A stud book.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
A pony goes to see the doctor one day.
He says, "Doc, you've got to help me. I've had this terrible sore throat for weeks and I think there must be some badly wrong."
The doctor examines him and then reassures him saying, "It's okay, it's nothing serious; you're just a little horse."
What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
What do you call a horse on a boat attached to land?
Docked.
How does a Pegasus ask her boyfriend to propose?
She says “You’ve got to put a wing on it.”
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
Where do horses go to the bathroom?
The bathroom stall-ion.
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
What do you call an explosive horse?
Neigh-palm.
What’s a horse’s favorite fruit?
Canterlope.
What cartoon do horses like to watch?
Whinny the Pooh.
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
Why couldn’t the baby horse eat dessert?
It was foal.