How do winged horses walk if they become pirates?
Peg-asus legs.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
What do horses eat with their salad? Dressage-ing.
What did the horse say to his friend that didn’t come party last night?
You didn’t turnout.
How do mares keep track of their boyfriends?
A stud book.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
What did the horse reply when asked if it can jump 3 feet?
“I lope so!”
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
Where do most horses work for their first job?
Re-tail stores.
What do ponies look for in a vehicle?
Lots of horsepower.
What do you call a horse on a boat attached to land?
Docked.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
How did the horse make payments?
In in-stallion-ments.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
What did the teenage horse say when her phone broke?
I canter even.
What is the coldest type of horse?
A freezian.
Beat funny horse puns
What’s a horse’s favorite makeup brand?
Neighhhbelline.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What do you call a horse running on a table?
A counter canter.
A pony goes to see the doctor one day.
He says, "Doc, you've got to help me. I've had this terrible sore throat for weeks and I think there must be some badly wrong."
The doctor examines him and then reassures him saying, "It's okay, it's nothing serious; you're just a little horse."
What would a winged horse put in the bathtub?
A pegaLush bath bomb.
What did the jockey respond when someone asked to ride his horse?
“Dis-mount is mine.”
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
How do horses show gratitude?
Flank you very much.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
How did the ponies stay in touch?
C-horse-pondence.
Why do horses make good lawyers?
Attention to de-tail.
Why did the pony turn himself in?
He felt rem-horse.
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
Why did they stop giving the horse grass?
They wanted it to be less green.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses?
Bronchitis.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
Why was the pony so excited to be invited to a rally with the president?
It was a huge end-horse-ment.
What’s a horse’s favorite fruit?
Canterlope.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
How does a Pegasus ask her boyfriend to propose?
She says “You’ve got to put a wing on it.”
Go to BabaMail
