What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
How did the ponies stay in touch?
C-horse-pondence.
Where do horses get their weaves from?
Mane.
What do you call a horse that lives next door to you?
A neigh-bor.
What do you call a rainbow you ride your horse on?
A rein-bow.
What did the teenage horse say when her phone broke?
I canter even.
What did the horse say when it saw a sheepdog?
“Why is your furlong?”
What did the ponies do when it was raining? Stay ind-horse.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses?
Bronchitis.
What do you call an explosive horse?
Neigh-palm.
Black Beauty - Now there's a dark horse.
Why couldn’t the baby horse eat dessert?
It was foal.
How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field?
They horse-boo.
What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
Why couldn’t the equestrian find the carrots? They were down by the bay.
What do you call old horses?
Ancient roans.
What kind of car do fancy horses drive?
Mustangs.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
Why didn’t the horse tell her friend she was a thief?
She didn’t want to saddle her with that information.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
Why did the horse never get cold?
It was a Dutch warmblood.
What natural disaster took out the ancient horses?
A volcanic stirruption.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
What did the horse reply when asked if it would try water polo?
“I would dapple.”
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
What's a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
Why are horses so good at the shooting range?
They’re hunters.
What did the horse reply when asked if it can jump 3 feet?
“I lope so!”
A pony goes to see the doctor one day.
He says, "Doc, you've got to help me. I've had this terrible sore throat for weeks and I think there must be some badly wrong."
The doctor examines him and then reassures him saying, "It's okay, it's nothing serious; you're just a little horse."
When do vampires like horse racing?
When it's neck and neck.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
How do baby horses get tucked in at night?
They get told a tail.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
How do winged horses walk if they become pirates?
Peg-asus legs.
What would a winged horse play in a band?
The pegabass guitar.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
What is the coldest type of horse?
A freezian.
Beat funny horse puns
What’s a horse’s favorite makeup brand?
Neighhhbelline.
What do horses eat with their salad? Dressage-ing.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
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