Q. Why did the gorilla go to the barber?
A. He was concerned about his ape-pearance.
Did you hear about the extremely serious gorilla?
He didn't monkey around.
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
Why do gorillas have really big fingers?
Because they have really big nostrils!
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
Why did the gorilla have to visit the vet?
He wasn't peeling well
What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
Why wasn't King Kong able to climb to the top of the Empire State Building?
He couldn't quite fit in the elevator.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
What do you call a white skinned gorilla?
Honkey Kong.
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.
What do you call a gorilla who has been locked up in prison?
A kong-vict
What is just as big as a gorilla but literally weighs nothing?
A gorilla's shadow.
What's the best time of year to see gorillas in the wild? Ape-ril.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite movie?
A. Planet of the Apes.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite holiday?
A. Ape-ril Fools Day!
Q. Where did the gorilla like to go sailing?
A. The Chimpan-Sea
Q. What happens when a gorilla has a melt down?
A. He goes absolutely bananas!
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
What do you call a gorilla with no arms?
An ape-utee
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.
Why did the advertising tycoons hire a bunch of apes?
They were running a gorilla marketing campaign.
Why should you never fight a Gorilla?
They know king kong fu.
What food did the Gorilla order when he went to France?
Ape Suzettes.
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
What noise does a gorilla’s doorbell make?
King Kong
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
How do gorillas get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
Did you hear about the gorilla with a screw loose?
He needed to use a money wrench to tighten it.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
Which technique does a Gorilla borrow from another animal when it gets romantic? The bear hug!
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
Q. What is a gorilla in a wheelchair called?
A. Dis-ape-led.
What do you call a gorilla wearing headphones?
Anything you'd like, it can't hear you.
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
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