What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
What noise does a gorilla’s doorbell make?
King Kong
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
Q. Whay aren't gorillas afraid of zombies?
A. Because the ape-ocalypse doesn't frighten them.
Q. Why was the gorilla's jungle party so lame?
A. Because theyran out of chimps and dip.
Why should you never fight a Gorilla?
They know king kong fu.
How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!
What do you call a gorilla with a million dollars?
A gorillanaire
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
A gorilla starts off his day by going to his car
When he gets to his car, he notices hes missing something. He walks back in his house, and asks his wife "Have you seen monkeys?"
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
Q. Why are big gorilla turds always so stinking tired?
A. Because they're all pooped out!
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
What's the best time of year to see gorillas in the wild? Ape-ril.
Why wasn't King Kong able to climb to the top of the Empire State Building?
He couldn't quite fit in the elevator.
Q. Why did the girl-illa win the beauty contest?
A. She was beast of show!
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
What is just as big as a gorilla but literally weighs nothing?
A gorilla's shadow.
What do you call a polyarmourus deceased gorilla?
Harembe.
Q. Which country was founded by wild gorillas?
A. The Banana Republic.
A muslim woman wanted to adopt a gorilla. Her husband wouldn't allow it.
He said, that's haram, bae.
Why do gorillas have really big fingers?
Because they have really big nostrils!
Q. What happens when a gorilla has a melt down?
A. He goes absolutely bananas!
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Q. Which book makes virgin gorillas blush?
A. The Naked Ape.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite movie?
A. Planet of the Apes.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
How did the gorilla know she was poorly? She had a belly ape.
Q. Which kind of ape enjoys smoking tobaco?
A. Cigarilla.
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
Did you hear about the gorilla that was from Vietnam?
He was a viet kong.
Q. What haapens if a gorilla sits on your piano?
A. You get a flat note.
What do you call a gorilla in a cement-mixer?
King Koncrete.
Q. Why did the gorilla cross the road?
A. To get to the monkey biz on the other side.
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
What is a gorillas favourite ice cream flavour.
Chocolate chimp.
Why did the gorilla have to visit the vet?
He wasn't peeling well
Q. How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two, but it has to be a really BIG light bulb.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
How do gorillas get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
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