How do gorillas get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your start getting it ready Fridae and Saturdae!
What do you call a gorilla wearing headphones?
Anything you'd like, it can't hear you.
Q. Why was the gorilla's jungle party so lame?
A. Because theyran out of chimps and dip.
What's the best time of year to see gorillas in the wild? Ape-ril.
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
What do you call a polyarmourus deceased gorilla?
Harembe.
What do you call a white skinned gorilla?
Honkey Kong.
What do you call a large gorilla who appears to be in a bad mood?
Sir.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
Q. What do you call a gorilla who studies large primates and has great grades?
A. Ape lust student.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
Q. Which kind of ape enjoys smoking tobaco?
A. Cigarilla.
Q. What do gorillas and big apes do to make each other laugh?
A. They tell punny jokes about humans!
Q. What is a gorilla in a wheelchair called?
A. Dis-ape-led.
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
Q. Why was the baby gorilla such a big brat?
A. Because his parents are big apes.
How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!
What do gorillas and orangutans wear in the kitchen?
Ape-rons.
Why don't gorillas vote?
They're ape-political.
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
Q. How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two, but it has to be a really BIG light bulb.
Q. Why did the gorilla go to the barber?
A. He was concerned about his ape-pearance.
What’s the first thing a gorilla learns in school? The ape b c’s.
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
What is a gorillas favourite ice cream flavour.
Chocolate chimp.
Where do gorillas keep their beehives?
Apeiaries.
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
What is the best thing to do if you notice a gorilla is sitting at your desk?
Find another place to sit.
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
Q. Whay aren't gorillas afraid of zombies?
A. Because the ape-ocalypse doesn't frighten them.
Why do gorillas have really big fingers?
Because they have really big nostrils!
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
Why wasn't King Kong able to climb to the top of the Empire State Building?
He couldn't quite fit in the elevator.
A gorilla starts off his day by going to his car
When he gets to his car, he notices hes missing something. He walks back in his house, and asks his wife "Have you seen monkeys?"
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
How do you tell the difference between a rabbit and a gorilla?
A rabbit looks nothing like a gorilla
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
My girlfriend and I saw an inflatable gorilla In front of a jacuzzi store
She asked me why they would do that for a jacuzzi store. I told her it was a guerilla tactic. She was not impressed.
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
What do you call a gorilla with a million dollars?
A gorillanaire