What is the most effective way to cook a crocodile?
In a croc pot.
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
What’s the difference between a dog and a gator?
A dog’s bark is worse than its bite.
What do you call an alligator who is holding a compass?
A navigator.
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
What do alligators call human children?
Appetizers.
What do you get if you put an alligator in a blender?
Gatorade.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
Whichever gator stole all the food, we'll catch the crook-a-dile.
Did you hear about the law firm with the most intimidating lawyers?
It’s filled with liti-gators.
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
Alligators can live up to 100 years…
Which is why there’s a chance that they will see you later.
What do you call it when a Crocodile becomes an Elvis Impersonator?
Crocabilly
If someone says, “See you later alligator,” you must respond with, “In a while crocodile.”
It’s in the bye laws.
What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
A congregator.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
When alligators need energy, they just slug down some gator-ade.
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
What do dehydrated alligators drink?
Gatorade.
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
Why are alligator comedians so funny?
Their wit is as razor sharp as their teeth!
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
What kind of croc hangs out in back passages around town?
An Alley-gator.
Did you hear about the constipated crocodile?
It was a crockashit.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
Why won’t crocodiles attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy!
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gator.
What is good at maths and related to a crocodile?
A calcu-gator
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
Did you here about the croc with a serious drug addiction?
It was a crackodile.
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
What do you call an alligator who kills bugs all day long?
A fumigator.
Did you hear about the crocodile who was unable to mate?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
What do you call an alligator that makes others fight?
An instigator.
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
Any time I wear a t shirt with a picture of a crocodile on it, I feel a little sick.
I think I might be Lacoste intolerant.
If a crocodile never admits he is wrong, he must be in de-nile..
Let's play some scrabble, I just need to get the croc-a-tiles.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gater.
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