Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
What came first, the alligator or the crocodile?
The dinosaur.
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
An alley-gator!
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
What do you call an alligator who kills bugs all day long?
A fumigator.
If a crocodile never admits he is wrong, he must be in de-nile..
What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
Alligators will see you later, crocodiles in a while.
Why are alligator comedians so funny?
Their wit is as razor sharp as their teeth!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
What kind of croc hangs out in back passages around town?
An Alley-gator.
What do you call it when a Crocodile becomes an Elvis Impersonator?
Crocabilly
Did you hear about the law firm with the most intimidating lawyers?
It’s filled with liti-gators.
Why was the crocodile invited to glamorous parties?
Because she was a snappy dresser.
I like you, you croc my world.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
A boy sees an alligator in the zoo and shouts,
“Hey, are you a caiman?”
The alligator replies, “I’m alright, thanks, kid!”
What is good at maths and related to a crocodile?
A calcu-gator
What’s the difference between a dog and a gator?
A dog’s bark is worse than its bite.
What do dehydrated alligators drink?
Gatorade.
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
Did you hear about the croc and rooster that had a kid together?
It was a crocadoodledoo.
What’s worse than one crocodile coming to dinner?
Two crocodiles coming to dinner.
If someone says, “See you later alligator,” you must respond with, “In a while crocodile.”
It’s in the bye laws.
What do you get if you put an alligator in a blender?
Gatorade.
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
If you need to share out your to-do list, just be a dele-gator.
Let's play some scrabble, I just need to get the croc-a-tiles.
What do you call a reptile that works on a farm?
An irri-gator.
Did you hear about the crocodile who was unable to mate?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
Did you here about the croc with a serious drug addiction?
It was a crackodile.
What is the most effective way to cook a crocodile?
In a croc pot.
That alligator took great photos, he was a bit of a snapper.
Any time I wear a t shirt with a picture of a crocodile on it, I feel a little sick.
I think I might be Lacoste intolerant.
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
How many limbs does an alligator have?
It all depends on what he ate for lunch, dinner and breakfast.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
Go to BabaMail
