What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
Did you hear about the constipated crocodile?
It was a crockashit.
Why won’t crocodiles attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy!
What do dehydrated alligators drink?
Gatorade.
What do you call an alligator that makes others fight?
An instigator.
Alligators can live up to 100 years…
Which is why there’s a chance that they will see you later.
When alligators need energy, they just slug down some gator-ade.
If a crocodile never admits he is wrong, he must be in de-nile..
If someone says, “See you later alligator,” you must respond with, “In a while crocodile.”
It’s in the bye laws.
What do you call an alligator who kills bugs all day long?
A fumigator.
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gater.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
Did you here about the croc with a serious drug addiction?
It was a crackodile.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
What is a crocodiles favourite dessert?
Brandy snaps.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
Why are alligators long and green?
Because if they were small and red, they would be tomatoes.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
What do alligators and Windows have in common?
Neither of them has enough bytes!
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
How many limbs does an alligator have?
It all depends on what he ate for lunch, dinner and breakfast.
What do you call an alligator who is holding a compass?
A navigator.
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
Some people like to play croc-quet.
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
What do you call a reptile that works on a farm?
An irri-gator.
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
What kind of croc hangs out in back passages around town?
An Alley-gator.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
Why was the crocodile invited to glamorous parties?
Because she was a snappy dresser.
What do you call it when a Crocodile becomes an Elvis Impersonator?
Crocabilly
What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
Alligators will see you later, crocodiles in a while.
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
Why don't alligators like fast food?
Because it is difficult to catch.
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
An alley-gator!
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
I like you, you croc my world.
Go to BabaMail
