What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
Let's play some scrabble, I just need to get the croc-a-tiles.
Did you hear about the constipated crocodile?
It was a crockashit.
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
What is the most effective way to cook a crocodile?
In a croc pot.
What do alligators call human children?
Appetizers.
What came first, the alligator or the crocodile?
The dinosaur.
Alligators can live up to 100 years…
Which is why there’s a chance that they will see you later.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gator.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
That alligator took great photos, he was a bit of a snapper.
Why are alligator comedians so funny?
Their wit is as razor sharp as their teeth!
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gater.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
If you ever need directions, call for a navi-gator.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
Why don't alligators like fast food?
Because it is difficult to catch.
I went to the zoo the other day and saw an alligator that will only eat finely chopped food.
It was an alligrator.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
If you need a mystery-solving, just call an in-vesti-gator.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
What do you get when you cross an alligator and a crocodile.
A funeral.
Whichever gator stole all the food, we'll catch the crook-a-dile.
Did you hear about the law firm with the most intimidating lawyers?
It’s filled with liti-gators.
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
What did the alligator say to the other alligator that was in the way?
“Please move, I need to get bayou.”
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
How many limbs does an alligator have?
It all depends on what he ate for lunch, dinner and breakfast.
I like you, you croc my world.
A boy sees an alligator in the zoo and shouts,
“Hey, are you a caiman?”
The alligator replies, “I’m alright, thanks, kid!”
When alligators need energy, they just slug down some gator-ade.
What kind of croc hangs out in back passages around town?
An Alley-gator.
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
If someone says, “See you later alligator,” you must respond with, “In a while crocodile.”
It’s in the bye laws.
What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
Alligators will see you later, crocodiles in a while.
What do you call an alligator who is holding a compass?
A navigator.
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
Any time I wear a t shirt with a picture of a crocodile on it, I feel a little sick.
I think I might be Lacoste intolerant.
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
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