My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
If you need to share out your to-do list, just be a dele-gator.
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
I went to the zoo the other day and saw an alligator that will only eat finely chopped food.
It was an alligrator.
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gater.
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
If a crocodile never admits he is wrong, he must be in de-nile..
A crocodile tried to copy a rooster to wake his friends one morning, he went croc-a-doodle do.
Alligators can live up to 100 years…
Which is why there’s a chance that they will see you later.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
When alligators need energy, they just slug down some gator-ade.
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
How many limbs does an alligator have?
It all depends on what he ate for lunch, dinner and breakfast.
What do you call an alligator who kills bugs all day long?
A fumigator.
What do alligators call human children?
Appetizers.
What is good at maths and related to a crocodile?
A calcu-gator
What is a crocodiles favourite dessert?
Brandy snaps.
What do you call a reptile that works on a farm?
An irri-gator.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
What do you get when you cross an alligator and a crocodile.
A funeral.
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
Why are alligator comedians so funny?
Their wit is as razor sharp as their teeth!
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
Did you here about the croc with a serious drug addiction?
It was a crackodile.
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
Some people like to play croc-quet.
If you ever need directions, call for a navi-gator.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
Let's play some scrabble, I just need to get the croc-a-tiles.
Why won’t crocodiles attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy!
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
If you need a mystery-solving, just call an in-vesti-gator.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
Any time I wear a t shirt with a picture of a crocodile on it, I feel a little sick.
I think I might be Lacoste intolerant.
What do alligators and Windows have in common?
Neither of them has enough bytes!
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
Alligators will see you later, crocodiles in a while.
Did you hear about the crocodile who was unable to mate?
He had a reptile dysfunction.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
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