What kind of car does Yogi bear drive?
A Furrari.
Goldilocks was killed last night.
The killers did it with their own bear hands.
What is a polar bear’s favorite food?
Iceberg lettuce and snow peas.
What do grizzlies use in the shower?
Bear conditioner.
Why do bears have sticky fur?
Because they use honey combs.
Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.
What do you call a bear with no arms and no legs?
An ambulance. This is no time for jokes.
Why didn’t the teddy bear want any dessert?
He was already stuffed.
If I ever find out the name of the surgeon who messed up my limb transplant, I’ll kill him…
With my bear hands.
Why did the sloth get fired from his job?
He would only do the bear minimum.
What is a polar bear’s favorite cereal?
Ice Crispies.
How did the grizzly walk in the snow?
Bear footed.
Where do the teenaged polar bears go to dance?
To the snow-ball.
What do you call two polar bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.
What do you call a bear who practices dentistry?
A molar bear.
What do you call a freezing bear?
A brrrrrrr.
Have you ever had a dream about a bear eating you?
I call them bite-mares.
Did you hear about the guy who got killed by a bear?
It was a grizzly death.
What do you call a polar bear in Florida?
A solar bear.
What color socks do bears wear?
They don’t wear socks, they have bear feet.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
I’ll think of another pun soon…
Just bear with me.
What kind of car do bears drive?
Fur-aris.
A bear walks into a bear and says, “I’ll have a pint of lager……….. and a packet of crisps.”
The bartender says, “Sure, but what’s with the big pause?”
The bear replies, “I dunno, I was born with them!”
Why do grizzlies never look sad?
Because whenever there’s a problem, they just grin and bear it.
How can a bear catch fish without a pole?
They use their bear hands.
What would bears be without bees?
Ears.
How does a bear get from one place to another?
On a bear-o-plane.
How does a bear stop a movie?
They hit the paws button.
What do you call bears with no ears?
B.