Which animal can hibernate while standing on its head?
Yoga Bear.
What do you call a grizzly bear who gets caught in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
Why didn’t the teddy bear eat his lunch?
Because he was stuffed.
What do you call bears with no ears?
B.
How does a bear stop a movie?
They hit the paws button.
What is a polar bear’s favorite snack?
Brrrrrittos.
Why didn’t the teddy bear want any dessert?
He was already stuffed.
What do you call two polar bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.
Have you ever had a dream about a bear eating you?
I call them bite-mares.
What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?
Winnie the PU!
What do grizzlies use in the shower?
Bear conditioner.
Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.
What do polar bears have for lunch?
Ice burgers.
I’ll think of another pun soon…
Just bear with me.
Why is it cheap to feed polar bears?
Because they live on ice only.
Why did the bear dissolve in water?
It was polar.
Where do the teenaged polar bears go to dance?
To the snow-ball.
What do you call a bear who practices dentistry?
A molar bear.
What is a bear’s favorite soda?
Coca Koala.
Why do grizzlies never look sad?
Because whenever there’s a problem, they just grin and bear it.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
What color socks do bears wear?
They don’t wear socks, they have bear feet.
What did the bear say when her date showed up too early?
I’ll be out in a minute, I’m bearly dressed.
What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig?
A teddy boar.
How do bears keep their houses cool in summer?
Bear conditioning.
What is a polar bear’s favorite food?
Iceberg lettuce and snow peas.
What do you call a bear with a bad attitude?
The bearer of bad news.
Why did the sloth get fired from his job?
He would only do the bear minimum.
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snow bank.
What does pooh eat at parties?
Blue bear-y pie.
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