What do you call vampires bats that cheer at football games?
Bat-on-twirlers.
What’s a bats favorite desert?
I-Scream!
What happened when a bat misbehaved in night school?
She got suspended.
What did the grape say when the bat squished on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
Where do bats keep their money?
The blood bank.
Why did the bat fire a chauffeur?
He drove everyone batty.
Where do bats go to gamble?
Bat-lantic City.
What do bats say to those they dislike? Good riddance to bat rubbish!
How do bats tell their future? They read their horrorscope.
Which bat can hang the highest and longest?
The acro-bat.
What game do bats like to play with birds?
Bat-mington.
How fast can a cave become vacant? At the drop of a bat.
What was the most famous bat comedy team?
Ab-bat and Costello.
What fruit do vampire bats like the best?
Neck-tarines.
Where do bats keep their money? The blood bank!
How do you write a book about Bats? With a ghostwriter.
What is the first thing that bats learn at school? The alphabat.
Why did the vampire need mouthwash? Because he had bat breath.
Did you hear about the two bats meeting? It was love at first bite!
When does a bat go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
What did the bat say when she was invited to dinner?
No, fangs. I just ate.
What did the bat say to the friend who itched and squirmined?
Come back when you have washed out the virmin.
Why did the bat walk in her pijamas to take a bath?
Because she did not have a bat robe.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
What problem did the young bat experience?
The hangout.
What did the bat say to the diabetic? Nice knawing you!
How do you write a book about bats? With a ghostwriter.
What did the bat do when she did not know the answer in class?
She winged it.
Who were the original transformers? Vampire bats!
Why shouldn’t you drive with a vampire?
He will drive you batty.
Why do psychiatrists study bats?
They want to learn about their hang-ups.
Where do bats get their education?
In night schools.
Where do bats like to relax?
In the bat-tub.
Why did the bat break up with her girlfriend?
She thought she was a pain in the neck.
What do you have to know to teach a bat tricks?
More than a bat.
Why don’t bats sleep like the rest of us?
They can't get the hang of it.
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
How do bats tell their future?
They read their horrors-cope.
What do you call an bat with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What is a bat’s favorite dessert?
Pineapple upside-down cake.
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
What did the baby mouse do when she saw a bat?
She ran home and told her mother she saw an angel
What position did the young vampire bat play on the football team?
Quater-bat.
How do bats greet a friend?
With a sound wave.
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
What do you call writing a book about breeding bats to pull carriages? A wheely bat idea.
Why did the bat look for a job?
She was tired of hanging around.
What happened if vampires came to a big dance?
A bat ball.
What do you call a bat with the flu?
An airborne disease.
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