Which bat can hang the highest and longest?
The acro-bat.
Why did the bat fire a chauffeur?
He drove everyone batty.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a ball?
A home run.
How do bats tell their future? They read their horrorscope.
How do bats tell their future?
They read their horrors-cope.
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
What did the grape say when the bat squished on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
How do you write a book about Bats? With a ghostwriter.
What's a bats favorite desert? I-Scream!
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
What did the bat do when she did not know the answer in class?
She winged it.
Where do bats keep their money?
The blood bank.
Why did the bat walk in her pijamas to take a bath?
Because she did not have a bat robe.
What do you call an bat with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
Why could not the young vampire bat play baseball?
He was a bat boy.
How do bats greet a friend?
With a sound wave.
How do you hold a bat?
By the wings.
Who were the original transformers? Vampire bats!
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
Why don’t bats sleep like the rest of us?
They can't get the hang of it.
Where do bats like to relax?
In the bat-tub.
What do bats say to those they dislike? Good riddance to bat rubbish!
When does a bat go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
What problem did the young bat experience?
The hangout.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
What did the baby mouse do when she saw a bat?
She ran home and told her mother she saw an angel
What happened when a bat misbehaved in night school?
She got suspended.
Why did the cat want to learn to fly?
She wanted to try bats.
What game do bats like to play with birds?
Bat-mington.
What praise did a bat’s friend deserve? A bat on the back.
How do bats line up in school?
In alpha-bat-ical order.
What is a good place for bat jokes?
A public bat room.
What did the bat complain about?
Flying with such frequency was exhausting.
What did the pastry cook say when he was making the cake?
Bat-a-cake. Bat-a-cake.
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
What do you call a dream when a vampire bat is chasing you?
A bat-mare.
Why shouldn’t you drive with a vampire?
He will drive you batty.
What's more amazing than a talking bat? A spelling bee!
What position did the young vampire bat play on the football team?
Quater-bat.
What is the first thing that bats learn at school? The alphabat.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet?
Blood-thirsty hacker.
Why did the bat look for a job?
She was tired of hanging around.
What did the bat say when she was invited to dinner?
No, fangs. I just ate.
Why do psychiatrists study bats?
They want to learn about their hang-ups.
What is a bat’s favorite dessert?
Pineapple upside-down cake.
What do you call a bat with ebola? African batman.
What do you call writing a book about breeding bats to pull carriages? A wheely bat idea.
Where do bats go to gamble?
Bat-lantic City.
Why did the vampire need mouthwash? Because he had bat breath.
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