The sheep says to the shepherd "you're an jerk and I hate you!" and the shepherd says "Say what?"
And the sheep goes "You herd me!"
Where is a flamingo’s favourite place to dance? The hop, of course!
Why can't college professors take exams at a zoo? Because there are too many cheetahs.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
What family does Maiasaur belong to? I don't think any families in our neighborhood have one!
What do you get if you cross a parrot with a woodpecker?
A bird that talks in morse code!
How Do Ducks Talk?
They don't, you quack.
What did the baby mosquito say after his first flight?
“Mama, mama! Did you see that? Everyone was clapping for me!”
Did you get to hear his new collection of wolf puns? They are howl-arious, absolutely rib cracking.
Why was the glow worm unhappy ?
Because her children weren’t that bright !
Before the Koalaville basketball team can play for the national championship, they have to make it through the koalafying rounds.
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
How do you make a fish laugh?
Tell it a whale of a tale.
The crow decided to dress up as Corvid-19 virus for the Halloween costume party.
The only difference between pea soup and roast beef is anyone can roast beef.
My son wanted a pet spider but they're to expensive.
I told him I'll get him one off the web.
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
Where do bats get their education?
In night schools.
Where do crows type? Crows type on cawmputers.
What did the wife beaver say to her astronaut husband? You are otter this world.
What kind of car does Yogi bear drive?
A Furrari.
Why did the man wear a rabbit as a hat? He didn’t want anyone to harm a Hare on his head!
A fly feels a bug on it's back. "Hey bug on my back, are you a mite?"
"I mite be !!" giggles the mite.
"That's the worst pun I've ever heard" groans the fly.
"What do you expect?" says the mite. "I came up with it on the fly. "
How do you make a telephone in the jungle?
With toucans and a piece of string.
Q. How do you describe the inate behavior of a new mother deer?
A. Doe-ting
What’s a whale’s favorite movie?
The Humpback Of Notre Dame.
What do you get when you cross a chili pepper, a shovel and a terrier?
A hot-diggity-dog.
To resolve the internal issues at the office, crows involved their cawnflict mediators.
Whatever floats your goat.
What’s black and white and bounces?
A rubber panda.
Have you ever tried setting fire to a flamingo? It’s really easy, you just burn the O.
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
What do llamas always say after yoga class?
“Llamaste.”
What is a pirate’s favorite’s fish?
A pirates favorite fish is a swordfish!
Why do pandas love watching classic movies?
Because they are in black and white.
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
Why do dogs run in circles?
Because it’s hard to run in a square.
If you were in the jungle, and a gorilla charged you, what should you do?
Pay him.
In order to be efficient, I named my parrots Roger, Gene, and Mick.
Two Byrds, one Stone.
Who was the most infamous terrorist in llama history?
Osama Bin Llama.
Why did the cat want to learn to fly?
She wanted to try bats.
That raven is so stubborn at times, he just needs to crow up.
Why did the tadpole feel lonely?
Because he was newt to the area.
What martial art do monkeys practice?
Flung Poo.
It’s pretty easy to choose your favorite type of bird
Flamingos have a leg up on all the rest.
I have the heart of a lion
And a lifetime ban from the San Diego Zoo.
Why do Otters swim on their backs?
To keep their nuts dry.
What did the horse reply when asked if it would try water polo?
“I would dapple.”
What do you call a beaver with a bad attitude who acts lazy? A beaver that doesn’t give a dam.
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