A zebra is the safest place to cross the road. Unless you are actually a zebra.
Why aren’t dogs good dancers? Because they have two left feet!
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
What did the queen bee say to the naughty bee? Beehive yourself.
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
My pet turtle died.
I'm not upset - just shell-shocked.
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
How do you plan to shell-ebrate the New Year?
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
After his teeth were cleaned, the werewolf ate the dentist.
Beavers enjoy being in the company of a river because they go with the flow.
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
Where was the dinosaur when the sun went down ? In the dark!
What do you call a well-dressed ant?
Eleg-ant.
What happened when a bat misbehaved in night school?
She got suspended.
What did the bat complain about?
Flying with such frequency was exhausting.
Why couldn’t the dog fit in his clothes?
He was a little husky
What do jellyfish and a girl after prom night have in common?
They can't be deboned.
Where do horses go on vacation?
Flankfurt.
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in a school.
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because the chicken joke wasn't invented yet.
That raven is so stubborn at times, he just needs to crow up.
Did you hear that the singer Seal left a night club event because of the revellers sharing derogatory poems about him?
He was dissed by the prose at a rave.
A beaver's tail makes them look odd.
But without it they would look otter.
Where do llamas go on vacation?
Alpacapuco.
What do you call monkeys who share an Amazon account?
Prime mates.
What do you call a dinosaur that eats it's vegetables? A.brocileasoarus
What do cows sing at their friend’s birthday parties?
“Happy Birthday to MOO, Happy Birthday to Moo!"
Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?
It ended in a tie.
Whatever floats your goat.
To resolve the internal issues at the office, crows involved their cawnflict mediators.
What did the dolphin say to its friend who wouldn’t stop lying?
Stop spouting nonsense!
Where did the kittens go on a school field trip? To the mewseum
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
If you have a line of 100 rabbits in a row and 99 of them take 1 step backwards, what do you have? A receding hare line.
What mouse was a Roman emperor?
Julius Cheeser!
Q. What do you call a gorilla who studies large primates and has great grades?
A. Ape lust student.
Why don’t dogs bark at their feet?
It isn’t polite to talk back to your paw.
How do fish get high?
Seaweed.
What did the dog say when he had a bad day?
Today has been ruff.
What does a beaver from Philly drink?
Wooder.
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
Why don't alligators like fast food?
Because it is difficult to catch.
What's more amazing than a talking turkey? A spelling bee!
What does the like to parrot wear to the beach? A beak-ini!
How do you draw flies?
With a pencil!
What do you call a wasp who is having a bad hair day?
A frizz-bee
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
Never take a flamingo to the local swimming baths. They really don’t like claw-rine.
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