What’s black and white and very noisy?
A panda with a set of drums.
What does the queen bee of every hive tell their workers to do?
She tells them to bee productive.
What is a dog’s favorite dessert?
Pupcakes.
Why are frogs so good at basketball?
Because they always make jump shots.
Why did they take Polly away?
He went crackers!
Can you name 10 dinosaurs in 10 seconds? Yes, 8 Iguanadons and 2 Stegasaurus.
Why did the dinosaur paint her toenails red? So she could hide in the strawberry patch!
An arrogant gazelle walks up to a bunch of lions and tells them how much better he is than them.
He was consumed by pride.
What do you get if you cross a mouse with a Triceratops? Enormous holes in the base boards.
Being shellfless entails volunteering at the relief center during disaster.
Did you heard about the zombie crow? He wants to eat your grains.
Where do you get frog's eggs?
At the spawn shop.
The reason you will see all the cows lie down when it starts to rain is because they want to keep each
udder dry.
What was the turkey suspected of? Fowl play.
Why do fish not like computers?
Because they are worried about getting caught in the Inter-net.
What do you drive in a river? An otter-mobile.
What do you call a camel with three humps?
Pregnant.
The reason the cow wore a bell around her neck was because her horn didn’t work anymore.
How do you write a book about Bats? With a ghostwriter.
On one bright Sunday morning, one long lost wolf finally met his longtime classmate. “So, Howl’s it goin’!”
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because all his uncles were ants.
The inventor of mosquito repellent likely did not know where to begin...
I guess he would have to start from scratch.
How do you circumcise a whale?
You send down four skin divers.
How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? it has a blue light.
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
When is the best time to paint a dog?
When they're asleep.
What do you call a fish with a tie?
Sofishticated!
An elephant's opinion carries a lot of weight.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
what do you call it when a lady mammal that enjoys swimming a lot, who has an unattractive twin sister, fires a gun at one of her gym buddies who also happens to work with clay as their profession?
hotter water otter daughter shot her potter spotter
I've just got a new job as a nursery rhyme cow.
I'm over the moon.
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
Cows will never make the police force because they simply refuse to go on steak-outs.
My pet raven, Poe, started coughing... thought it was Corvid-19, but then the bird flu away. Think I will see him nevermore.
How do fish go into business?
The start on a small scale.
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.
I went to the zoo today....
only to find out that some aquatic mammals had escaped.
It was otter chaos.
Why is the barn so noisy?
Because the cows have horns.
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
I was talking to a barn owl last night, when I mentioned that I'd just got engaged.
He said, "You twit! To who?"
What do you do if you find a blue Ichthyosaur ? Cheer him up!
Why don’t bats sleep like the rest of us?
They can't get the hang of it.
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
What do you call a dinosaurs fart? "A blast from the past"
If someone says, “See you later alligator,” you must respond with, “In a while crocodile.”
It’s in the bye laws.
What do you call a dead flamingo?
A flaminghost.
What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
What do you call a wasp who is having a bad hair day?
A frizz-bee
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