I asked a pink bird who its favourite artist was. It looked at me strangely and replied “Flamingo Starr, of course.”
I went to the zoo today....
only to find out that some aquatic mammals had escaped.
It was otter chaos.
What is the coldest type of horse?
A freezian.
Beat funny horse puns
What’s a horse’s favorite makeup brand?
Neighhhbelline.
Q. How do you describe the inate behavior of a new mother deer?
A. Doe-ting
What do rabbits like to sing? “Every bunny was kung fu fighting.”
Q. What do you get if you cross a parrot with a centipede?
A. A walkie talkie!
Q. What do you get if you cross a gorilla with a grizzly bear?
A. Fired from the zoo.
Why are kangaroos so qualified to be teachers?
Because they’re kan-gurus.
How do you write a book about bats? With a ghostwriter.
What’s a llama’s favorite movie?
Alpacalypse Now.
What kind of aquatic animal thinks you did a good job?
The seal of approval.
What is white and has long ears, whiskers, and sixteen wheels? Two rabbits on Rollerblades!
What do you call a Pig with three eyes?
Piiig.
What do you call a royal giraffe?
Your highness.
What happened when the bear applied at the movie theater?
He was told he was not koala-fied.
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn’t work.
Did you hear about the birds of prey who opened up a resort?
It was for owl seasons.
What do you get if you stand between two llamas?
Llamanated.
What did the jockey respond when someone asked to ride his horse?
“Dis-mount is mine.”
What did the seal with a broken arm say to the shark?
"Do not consume if seal is broken."
What does an owl need after having a bath?
A t-owl.
How did the shark do on his test?
Fin-Tastic!
The gang of crows used a crowbar to break into the house.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
Why are frogs good at baseball?
Because they catch a lot of fly balls.
A pony goes to see the doctor one day.
He says, "Doc, you've got to help me. I've had this terrible sore throat for weeks and I think there must be some badly wrong."
The doctor examines him and then reassures him saying, "It's okay, it's nothing serious; you're just a little horse."
The truck load of tortoise that crushed caused a turtle disaster.
How did the beaver introduce his wife? This is my significant otter.
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
What do you get when you put four ducks in a box?
A box of quackers.
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
What does a vampire bat call a bloodmobile?
Meals on Wheels.
I thought swimming with the dolphins was expensive, but swimming with the sharks cost me an arm and a leg!
Why was the cow always exercising? To build up its moo-scles
Have you ever tried crossing a lion with a flamingo? It will be pink, that’s the mane thing.
Where do parrots get away on holiday? To the beak!
What’s a goat’s favorite musical?
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dream Goat.
What's a frog's favorite game?
Hop-scotch (or leapfrog).
My dog loves designer hand-bags.
So I got him a Poochi.
How do you catch a squirrel who's interested in ornithology?
Climb a tree and act like a nuthatch.
Who brings presents for crows on Christmas? On Christmas? Santa Caws
What do you call the door to a chicken barn?
The hen-trance.
What cheesy dip do deer love to eat?
Fawn-due.
What do you call an turkey with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
Why was the Pirate sad when his parrot left him?.
It gave him the cold shoulder.
All the girls I meet keep thinking I’m a sheep.
Every time they see me they say “Ewe”
What do cows like to eat for lunch?
Moo-shroom soup
Go to BabaMail
