What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
I do wonder why my flamingo friends always do so well in tests and exams. After all, they always just wing it.
Did you know that the blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court …
The game would be cancelled.
Llama know if you don’t like these puns and alpaca my suitcase and leave!
Crows have 16 feather pinions and ravens have 17 pinions. It's just a matter of a pinion.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
Why don`t ducks tell jokes when they fly?
Because they would quack up.
What did the pastry cook say when he was making the cake?
Bat-a-cake. Bat-a-cake.
What’s a bats favorite desert?
I-Scream!
What’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a large chested crab?
One’s a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
Sorry seems to be the hardest word to say...
Unless you're Chinese. Then it's 'squirrel'.
What do you call a royal giraffe?
Your highness.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
How does a pod of dolphins make a decision?
They flipper coin!
Where do parrots invest their money?
In the stork market
What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?
Winnie the PU!
Why did the gorilla have to visit the vet?
He wasn't peeling well
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
What is the favorite bread of a crow? Crow-issant.
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea-weed.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
What kind of music do sophisticated frogs listen to?
Hopera.
I felt so guilty after I stepped on a snail this morning. You should of seen him, he looked genuinely crushed.
What type of food do worms like?
Your Halloween Candy!
What type of bread do deers enjoy the most?
“Sour-doe!”
What do you call two monkeys sharing an Amazon account?
Prime-Mates!
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.
What do you get if you cross a pelican and zebra? Two streets further away.
What’s the sequel to that?
Fuller mouse!
What's the difference between a lobster and a Chinese man who's been run over by a bus?
Ones a crustaecian and the other is a crushed Asian.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
What did the koala radio host say before going on a commercial break? “We’re going to take a small paws for our sponsors.”
What were the ponies most excited for in the meal?
The main horse.
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
I went to the zoo today....
only to find out that some aquatic mammals had escaped.
It was otter chaos.
Why wasn’t the giraffe invited to the party?
He was a pain in the neck.
How do you know you’ve been visited by a possessed rabbit? He leaves deviled eggs.
What do you get when your cross a bear and a tiger?
A bear and a tiger seeking revenge.
Why did the koala bear eat so much eucalyptus? He simply couldn’t leaf it alone.
The collective noun for kangaroos is a "troop". What is the collective noun for cars?
A Lot
What is a bunny’s motto? Don’t be mad, be hoppy!
Why are glow worms good to carry in your Halloween bag?
They can lighten your load!
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
Why are owls so good at math?
They excel at owlgebra.
What can one parrot do?
Not as much as toucan.