How do you keep a goat from charging?
You take his credit card away!
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!
What do dog scientists to with their bones?
They barium.
Just had Lobster Bisque for the first time!
It was souper good!
What do dogs and Santa have in common?
They are both seen Dachshund through the snow.
What sound do 8 sheep make?
Octo-bah.
Why could not the young vampire bat play baseball?
He was a bat boy.
Where are sharks from?
Finland!
What kind of dog loves bubble baths?
A shampoodle.
When a lion takes a lioness from another lion, he kills and eats any cubs she has. You'd think he'd be ashamed of himself.
But apparently he just swallows his pride.
I had a tattoo of a Scorpion on my back last night and to tell the truth...
It stings like hell.
What happened to the Easter bunny at school? He was eggspelled.
What do cows do when they’re introduced?
They give each other a milk shake.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
Flight allows flamingos to stay safe from predators. This is natural selection in action, and explains why flaminstays are extinct.
How do you tell the difference between a rabbit and a gorilla?
A rabbit looks nothing like a gorilla
What do you call the worlds tallest mosquito?
Himalarya.
Why don’t dolphins have hair?
They have whale pattern baldness.
What is a dog’s favorite coordinates?
K9.
Where do beavers sleep? They sleep on a river bed.
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with some beer?
Light ale!
Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside
What does a ghost panda eat?
BamBOO!
Why did the dinosaur cross the road ? The chicken hadn't evolved yet!
How do pigs write top secret messages?
With invisible oink!
What do you call two crows flying together?
An attempted murder
What do you get when a dinosaur walks through the strawberry patch? Strawberry jam.
What Did The Duck Say When The Waitress Came?
Put it on my bill!
What made the dinosaur's car stop ? A flat Tire-annosaurus!
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
What did the baby mouse do when she saw a bat?
She ran home and told her mother she saw an angel
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
It’s really annoying being stuck behind a flamingo in a car. They literally never put their foot down.
Why did the kangaroo hesitate?
He didn’t want to jump to a conclusion.
Where did Velociraptor buy things? At a dino-store!
What kind of bird always gets stuck in the nest? A velcrow.
What did the Dalmatian say when he finished his meal?
That really hit the spot.
My wife and I went to a turtle pun class yesterday.
It tortoise nothing.
A flying turtle is called a shellicopter.
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
How do you apologize to a sloth? BEAR your heart and soul.
Where do you take a sick hornet?
To the waspital.
Cows wear bells around their necks because it is moooo-sic to the farmer’s ears.
What do ducks get after they eat?
A bill.
What do crows read? Cawmics.
A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks: “Is this stool taken?”
The group of beavers loved the river because it has a really bubbly personality.
What do you call a T-Rex that gets into a fight with the Indominus Rex? Dino-sore.
What do you call two worms in love?
Soilmates.
Why did the bunny cross the road? He wanted to prove he could hip hop!
Go to BabaMail
