How does a bee get to school?
She takes a school buzz
Why was the whale so sad?
The fish was said because he was a Blue whale!
What do frogs do with paper?
Rip-it.
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a Spider? A Hare net!
What has a spiked tail, plates on its back, and sixteen wheels? A Stegosaurus on roller skates!
Baby flamingos really are badly behaved. I think it’s because their parents never put their foot down.
What do llamas do when they eat outside together?
They have an alpacanic.
Did you hear the joke about the lumberjack, The sheep and the goat?
I wood tell ewe, but it’s a baaaaaad joke
What’s the scariest koala movie ever made? The Bear Witch Project.
What is a dog’s favorite instrument?
A trom-bone
That romantic cow took his new girlfriend to the moo-vies.
Who do elephants get their Christmas presents from?
Elephanta Claus.
What happens if an owl doesn't wash?
It smells fowl.
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
Why are dinosaurs no longer around? Because their eggs stink.
What is the difference between a dirty bus stop, and a crab with breast implants?
Ones a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean!
Why do fish like worms?
Fish like worms because they’re hooked on them.
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
What do you call a dinosaurs fart? "A blast from the past"
I finally found out why flamingos sleep with one leg up! If they had both legs up they would fall over.
What do you call an important English snake?
Sir Pent.
Who is the worm's Prime Minister? Maggot Thatcher.
What happened when the two giraffes had a race?
It was neck and neck.
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet?
Blood-thirsty hacker.
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
What did the bat say to the diabetic? Nice knawing you!
Why do bears have sticky fur?
Because they use honey combs.
What did the cow who barged the other cow say?
Moo-ve!
My fat parrot escaped from its cage... To be honest, it's a weight off my shoulders!
What do you get if you cross a worm and a young goat? A dirty kid.
Why did the cranberries turn red?
They saw the turkey dressing!
Flamingos are great at social events; they flamingle really well.
Why did the gorilla have to visit the vet?
He wasn't peeling well
What did the deer say after she saw her Amazon bill?
“I spent too much doe!”
Is it true that a dinosaur won't attack if you hold a tree branch? That depends on how fast you carry it!
What did one python say to the other before they made a deal?
Let’s “snake” on it.
What do you call a Mexican bear with a rubber toe?
Robearto.
What do you call a polyarmourus deceased gorilla?
Harembe.
A fight between tiger and lion broke out. Both of them wanted to become the next empe-roar of the jungle.
What is a koala’s favorite exercise?
Bearobics.
Q: What do tigers and computers have in common?
A: They both have mega bites.
How much does it cost to fly Santa’s sleigh?
About 9 bucks.
What do you get when you cross a tortoise and a llama?
A turtle-neck sweater.
Elephants will toil all day, and they work for peanuts.
What do you call a frog spy?
A croak and dagger agent.
A beaver asked his fellow beavers to hurry up and said, "Water you waiting for, make haste."
What do you call a bat with the flu?
An airborne disease.
Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish.
How do bats tell their future? They read their horrorscope.
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