I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the “G”!
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
Where do Egyptians seal away their drugs?
In a narcophagus.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
A zebra is the safest place to cross the road. Unless you are actually a zebra.
How tall is a spider?
Eight foot.
Q: Why did the beaver need an alarm clock?
A: It was to dam early.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
The only things wolves have that no other animal on the face of the earth has are wolf cubs.
Who’s a llama’s favorite U.S. president?
Barack Ollama.
Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
What did the dinosaur ask his pet dog when he wanted afternoon tea with him?
Do you want some tea, Rex?
What’s green and hangs from trees?
Giraffe snot.
What did the carrot say to the rabbit? Do you want to grab a bite?
What happened when the bat swallowed the alarm-clock?
She turned into a ding-bat.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
Have you ever tried setting fire to a flamingo? It’s really easy, you just burn the O.
What do you call a camel with three humps?
Pregnant.
How do you measure the circumference of a Sheep?
Shepherds Pie
Why did the blind seal get eaten by the orca?
Because he couldn’t see that whale.
Did you hear about the woman who complained about her rabbit stew? She said there was a hare in her soup.
A flamingo only ever asks for a plaster when it hurts its pinky.
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
My dog has expensive taste in shoes.
So I got her some Jimmy Chews.
What do you call two rabbits racing down the road? The fast and the furriest.
What does the parrot get at the end of a restaurant meal? The bill!
What do you call a white crow?
A caw-casian.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
What do you call someone who always takes pictures of their dog?
A pup-arazzi.
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
As soon as one beaver jumped in the river to search for his key, it got shocked, as the current was too strong.
Why did the bee get married?
She found her honey.
Why did the turkey cross the road? It was the chicken's day off!
What do you call a royal goat wearing denim?
Billy Jean King.
What kind of key has no lock?
A turkey.
A wolf that uses bad language is known as a swearwolf.
Why do flamingos make bad pets? They are too much of a birden.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
What did Dracula say when he saw a giraffe for the first time?
I’d like to get to gnaw you.
Accidentally ran over a French seal today .
Phoque.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
Why did the police arrest the turkey? They suspected it of fowl play
What's the key to a great Thanksgiving dinner? The turKEY
What does a deer call her boyfriend?
Cari-boo.
I killed a spider with soap
He got a clean death.
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
Top 25 Funniest Duck Names:
1. James Pond
2. Quack Sparrow
3. Duck Norris
4 Quacks-a-Lot
5 Quackhead
6 Quacko
7. Quackers
8. Nutquacker
9. Quacker Jack
10. Quack Efron
11. Quack Black
12. Moby Duck
13. Quackula
14. Sir Duckington
15. Eggbert
16. Quackers
17. Duckleberry Finn
18. Quacker Jack
19. Lucky Duck
20. Cheese and quackers
21. Quaker Jack
22. Duckingham Palace
23.Waddles
24. Quackie Chan
25 Firequacker
The cawllarborne of the skinny crow was so pronounced.
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
Go to BabaMail
