What does Willow Smith say to her pets? I whip my hare back and forth.
What did the river say when it saw beavers for the first time? “Well, I’ll be dammed.”
What is a cat’s favorite game to play with a mouse? Catch!
What do you call a flying monkey?
A hot air baboon.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing?
“I’m not a people porcine.”
When you cross a camel with a cow, you will end up with a lumpy milkshake.
What kind of dog sniffs out flowers?
A bud hound.
If you see a wasp, don't kill it. Let it bee.
The zookeeper told me I wasn’t allowed to buy the animals so I asked why the zebra had a barcode.
How do you know you have a tape worm?
It’s comming out of your belly!
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and a sheep?
A woolly good jumper.
When can three giant dinosaurs get under an umbrella and not get wet? When it's not raining!
Something’s goat to give.
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
What kind of horse do you ride after dark?
A night mare.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
Why don't squirrels wear skinny jeans?
Because their nuts won't fit.
What can one parrot do?
Not as much as toucan.
I used to know two birds who excelled in ballet...
They were two toucans.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
What side does the zebra have the most stripes on?
The outside.
What do seals do when they need medical attention?
Sea kelp.
Q: How did the tiger perform during the show?
A: He was a roaring success.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
What is a giraffe’s favorite fruit?
Necktarines.
Why do beavers make the best neighbors?
Because they mind their own dam business.
What do you call a Mexican bear with a rubber toe?
Robearto.
If you ever need directions, call for a navi-gator.
What do you call a secret group of llamas?
The i-llama-nati.
What do you call an outlaw goat?
Billy the Kid.
How did the shark plead in its murder trial?
Not gill-ty.
What do you call a cemetery for bears?
Bearial grounds.
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What is just as big as a gorilla but literally weighs nothing?
A gorilla's shadow.
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks
What do you call an bat with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
Coop-cakes.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
A star athlete in Koalaville got kicked off the Olympic team for cheating. Unfortunately, he was diskoalafied.
What did the Easter bunny say to the carrot?It’s been nice gnawing you.
What do mountain climbers share around the campfire?
Goat Stories!
What do you get when you cross a chili pepper, a shovel and a terrier?
A hot-diggity-dog.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What do you call a goat swimming in the sea?
Billy Ocean.
What did the seal with a broken arm say to the shark?
"Do not consume if seal is broken."
What is an owl who has been caught called?
A spotted owl.
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye? Doyouthinkhesawus
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