Have you heard about that socially awkward chef that only cooks with snake meat?
I’m pretty sure he has Asp burgers.
What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
Ant-ten-eye.
Who is the wasps' favorite singer?
Sting.
What kind of car does an otter drive? A Furrari.
Which flower is known as the most ferocious flower? A tiger lily.
What do you call a flying turtle?
A shellicopter.
How do you apologize to a koala? BEAR your heart and soul.
What birds should you recycle?
Toucans.
What do you call an and with frogs legs?
An antphibian.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
What was Muhammad Ali’s favorite breed of dog?
A boxer.
What do you call a Stegosaurus with carrots in its ears? Anything you want, it can't hear you!
What do you call an owl with a deep voice?
A growl.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
What did the teenage crow want for his birthday? A brand new caw!
How do you make a duck sing soul music?
Put him in the microwave until his Bill Withers
Q. What did the doe say to the louse on her new baby fawn?
A. Gosh deer nit!
What is the maggot army called? The Apple Corps.
What's a frog's favorite game?
Hop-scotch (or leapfrog).
My dog has expensive taste in shoes.
So I got her some Jimmy Chews.
What key has legs and can't open doors? A Turkey.
What does a ghost panda eat?
BamBOO!
What is a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring!
Where does a dinosaur lay in the sun? At the dino-shore
Where do horses live in Harry Potter?
Diagonal Alley.
What is a dog’s favorite movie series?
Fifty shades of Greyhound.
When a lion takes a lioness from another lion, he kills and eats any cubs she has. You'd think he'd be ashamed of himself.
But apparently he just swallows his pride.
What do you think of puns about deer?
“I’m very fawn’d of them myself.”
My dog needed date ideas.
I told him to whine and dine her.
What did the banana do when he saw the monkey?
The banana split.
Did you hear about the birds of prey on black Friday?
It was a free for owl.
I used to know two birds who excelled in ballet...
They were two toucans.
What does a twelve-pound mouse say to a cat? 'Here Kitty, kitty, kitty'!
What do you get if you cross a bat with a woodpecker?
Bat-a-tat.
Because they got turtle recall, turtles never forget.
Flamingo parents are really cute with their babies. You should see them playing Beak a Boo.
What is an Italian’s favorite type of dog?
A ciao ciao.
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
What do you call a light-headed elephant?
An ele-faint.
Why did the scientist use a drink container to communicate with dolphins?
Because a bottle knows dolphin.
A priest, a rabbit and a deacon walk into a blood bank.
"I think I might be a type o." said the rabbit.
Pig always have ink all over their faces because they live in a pen.
What do you call an ant that doesn’t sink?
Bouy-ant.
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
Eleph-ino! (Sounds like "Hell if I know!")
In the Camel Kingdom, the king and his family live in the Camelot castle.
It’s really annoying being stuck behind a flamingo in a car. They literally never put their foot down.
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
How do you make a fish laugh?
Tell it a whale of a tale.
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