What Do You Call A Cat That Swallows A Duck?
A duck-filled-fatty-pus
Q. Will a sensible stag do something dangerous to impress a doe?
A. No, not even on a deer.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
A crow was arrested under suspicion of murder. The case was closed, as the judge said he had just caws.
I saw a squirrel throw up today! It was nuts!
What do you call a holy squirrel?
A chipmunk.
What kind of gang violence is common among owls?
A drive by hooting.
What do you call a horse that lives next door to you?
A neigh-bor.
What country has the most birds?
Turkey.
What did the dinosaur ask his pet dog when he wanted afternoon tea with him?
Do you want some tea, Rex?
What do you call a camel without humps?
Humphrey.
What do you call a gorilla stuck in a ventilation shaft
A Duct-ape.
What kind of horse do you ride after dark?
A night mare.
What’s a llama’s favorite drink?
Llamanade.
If you were in the jungle, and a gorilla charged you, what should you do?
Pay him.
What do you get if cross a science fiction film with a toad?
Star Warts.
How do you catch a rich squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a cashew.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
How do you keep a goat from charging?
You take his credit card away!
Flamingos are known by a different name when they dress up to go out – they call themselves glamingos.
How do you offer a camel tea?
"One hump or two?"
Zebras usually hold strong opinions. They are very black and white creatures.
How does an otter get into an honest business? Usually through the skylight.
What did the beaver say to his girlfriend?
Chew make me feel warm and fuzzy on the inside.
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which?
Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs!
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
What's the difference between and Buffalo and a Bison?
You can't wash your face in a Buffalo.
What did the shark say to the whale?
What are you blubbering about?
What do Chinese bears wear over their faces when they’re robbing banks?
Pandanas!
How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the “G”!
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
Flamingos are pretty daring birds. They like just about anything, as long as it’s eggs-citing.
Due to social distancing, I had a conversation with a spider today,
Seems nice, he’s a web designer.
What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear?
Winnie the PU!
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
What do you call an ant that doesn’t sink?
Bouy-ant.
Why did the turkey NOT cross the road?
To prove that he wasn't chicken.
What do you think of puns about deer?
“I’m very fawn’d of them myself.”
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day? God save the kin.
What do you get when you cross a dog with a calculator?
A friend you can count on.
What did the eye witness say about the camel who was using the bushes as a lavatory?
I saw the hump take a dump in a clump
What do you get when a penguin lays an egg on a hill?
An eggroll.
What do you call two worms in love?
Soilmates.
What made the dinosaur's car stop ? A flat Tire-annosaurus
Knock Knock!
Who is there?
Ears.
Ears who?
Ears one more beaver joke for you.
What did the dog say to its fleas?
Stop bugging me
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
Where did the bull carry his stock-market report?
In his beef case
Which dinosaur can't stay out of the rain? A Stegosaur-rust
Go to BabaMail
