What do you get when you cross an owl with an oyster?
Pearls of wisdom.
Why is it easy to spot a Cinderella-fish? They have glass flippers!
What does the Pope eat during Lent?
Holy mackerel.
What’s a shark’s favorite science fiction TV show?
Shark Trek.
It’s pretty easy to choose your favorite type of bird
Flamingos have a leg up on all the rest.
You can always find the little cows eating lunch inside the calf-etiria.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
Where did the duck go when he was sick? A:
To the ducktor.
What is a dog’s favorite type of homework?
A lab report.
Making puns ha?
Toucan play that game.
What do you call the door to a chicken barn?
The hen-trance.
I am an introvert, but you know how to bring me out of my shell.
Why is Pegasus so smart?
He’s all kno-wing.
Who is a crow’s favorite actor? Russell Crow!
What's a frog's favorite game?
Hop-scotch (or leapfrog).
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.
What's worse than lobsters on your piano?
Crabs on your organ!
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
A beaver goes into a bar and sees a man standing behind the bar and asks him...
"Excuse me sir. Is the bar tender here?"
When does a turkey go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
What's a goat's favorite organ?
A Kid-ney
Baby seal walks into a club...
Years later he would sing A kiss from a rose in the same club.
An electrocuted turtle feels shell-shocked.
How can you tell if there is a dinosaur in bed with you? By the `D' on his pajamas.
What does a cat wear to stop smelling? Antipurrspirant!
A zoo owner introduced his tiger to the visitors by saying "this is the most paw-some tiger at the zoo".
What's an owl's favorite Beatles song?
Owl You Need Is Love.
What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
Why are goats and rhinos attracted to each other?
Because they are both horny animals.
What type of dog doesn’t bark?
A hush puppy.
I can’t believe that during the attempted murder, John Crow, Russel Crow and Sheryl Crow were all in the room.
My lobster's name is:
Claude
How do you apologize to a koala? BEAR your heart and soul.
If you see a wasp, don't kill it. Let it bee.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie?
A License To Krill.
There was a weird Crab
Whenever he used to walk, his claws used to make a ta-ta-ta-ta sound.
Why does a duck say quack?
Because it can’t say moo.
What do dinosaurs have that no other animals have? Baby Dinosaurs.
Did you heard about the zombie crow? He wants to eat your grains.
I finally found out why flamingos sleep with one leg up! If they had both legs up they would fall over.
Where do flies go for a holiday?
Flywaii.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
What do ducks watch on TV?
Duck-umentaries.
Q. What did the witch get when she crossed a doe with a tornado?
A. A whirling deer-vish.
Why was the dog chasing his own tail?
Because he was trying to make both ends meet.
If dolphins lived on land, which country would they live in?
Finland!
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
For goat’s sake, that’s enough.