What do you call a spider with ten eyes?
A spiiiiiiiiiider.
Why did the mouse stay inside?
Because it was raining cats and dogs.
The inventor of mosquito repellent likely did not know where to begin...
I guess he would have to start from scratch.
Where is a frog's favorite place to eat?
At IHOP.
What do you call a fish with a tie?
Sofishticated!
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!
Which dance will a chicken not do?
The foxtrot.
Zebras usually hold strong opinions. They are very black and white creatures.
Which type of dinosaur could jump higher than a house ? Any kind! A house cannot jump!
What does Willow Smith say to her pets? I whip my hare back and forth.
What do you call a group of whale musicians?
An orca-stra.
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
What do you call a giraffe winning a horse race?
A long shot.
Where do beavers keep their money? Well, they keep it in the riverbank.
What do you call a rubber bumper on a yacht?
A shark absorber.
What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth?
Hard cheese!
Have you watched werewolves taking lunch, you will be amused, they literally wolf it down!
Why shouldn’t you tell an owl your secrets?
They’re always talon everyone.
Which flower is known as the most ferocious flower? A tiger lily.
Why was the snake mad at the jewel thief?
Because he wanted his diamondback.
What do you call it when cephalopods start becoming more strict about things?
Kraken down.
A chap sees a zebra sitting on a seat beside him in the cinema eating popcorn. He says “what are you doing here?” The zebra says, “well, I enjoyed the book”.
What do you get if you cross Bossy with a vampire?
Dracowla.
Did you here about the croc with a serious drug addiction?
It was a crackodile.
Q. What do you get when you cross a doe with a bull?
A. A deery cow.
Is a goat that eats office supplies on a staple diet?
Why did the dog fail his driving test?
Because he couldn’t parallel bark.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What do bees use to build roads? Nec-tar.
Why do dinosaurs eat raw meat? Because they don't know how to cook.
I got in a fight with a crab yesterday.
When I punched him he ran, goon.
Did you hear the joke about the lumberjack, The sheep and the goat?
I wood tell ewe, but it’s a baaaaaad joke
What type of dog chases anything red?
A bull dog.
Why was the farmer angry?
Because someone got his goat.
Where do cows get together?
The meet market.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
What do you call a veterinarian that specializes in canines?
A dogtor.
Why couldn’t the dog fit in his clothes?
He was a little husky
What do you call bears with no ears?
B.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which?
Tell it a funny Halloween joke and see which end laughs!
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
Where did the bunny groom and bunny bride go after their wedding? On a bunnymoon.
Where do otters come from?
Otter Space.
What's a sheep's favorite art style?
Baa's Relief
What would a winged horse play in a band?
The pegabass guitar.
What did the zoologist and the herbalist name their child? Tiger Woods.
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
An alley-gator!
What did the female dinosaur call her blouse making business? Try Sara's Tops
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