Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
For kitty littering.
What happened when the dog ate a firefly?
He smiled with de-light
Why did one camel spit and stomp when the other camel stole its cheese?
Because they’re “dramadairies”
What does Spider-man become when he joins the circus?
an aracnobat.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
We did not understand what the mother turtle was saying because it was all in ridleys.
Some pink birds can be really rude. I approached a group of them the other day and they screamed “Flamingo away!”
How do tigers like their cheese?
Grrrrreated
What's the opposite of an elephant?
An eleph-antonym.
I can’t believe that during the attempted murder, John Crow, Russel Crow and Sheryl Crow were all in the room.
Where is the best place to get camel milk?
Straight from the Dromedairy.
Did you hear about the law firm with the most intimidating lawyers?
It’s filled with liti-gators.
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
A beaver told a joke about a waterfall. It was a pour joke.
What do you get when you sit under a cow?
A pat on the head.
What do crows read? Cawmics.
Where do bats keep their money? The blood bank!
Why are frogs so happy?
Because they eat whatever bugs them.
How do you know carrots are good for your eyes? Because you never see a rabbit wearing glasses.
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
Q. Why was the lady baboon so atrracted to the big gorilla?
A. 'Cause he had s*x ape-peal.
What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse?
Call the marrier!
What is a parrot’s favorite game?
Hide and Speak!
What do you call a lazy goat?
Billy Idle.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a ball?
A home run.
What are pigs celebrating when they celebrate their birthday? The day they were boar-n.
What’s the difference between a marine biologist and a dog?
One tags a whale, the other wags a tail.
What is a grandma sheep called?
A baaaa-nana
The weather's getting colder, I really fancy some hot croc-o-late.
An electrocuted turtle feels shell-shocked.
Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.
Why could not the young vampire bat play baseball?
He was a bat boy.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day? God save the kin.
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
What do you get if you cross a wasp with a doorbell?
A hum-dinger!
Why can't you take a turkey to church? They use FOWL language.
How do pigs write top secret messages?
With invisible oink!
What do you call a truck-load of tortoises crashing into a train-load of terrapins?
A turtle disaster.
What kind of cheese do rodents like?
Mousearella.
Where do prehistoric reptiles like to go on vacation? To the dino-shore.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
Why do giraffes have long necks?
Because their feet smell.
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
What is a bunny’s motto? Don’t be mad, be hoppy!
What’s black, dangerous and hides in trees?
A crow with a machine gun.
What's invisible and smells like worms?
Bird farts.
What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday?
It’s roar birthday!
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