What kind of car does a sheep drive?
A LAMBorghini
What do rabbits like to sing? “Every bunny was kung fu fighting.”
How come Crabs never share with their friends?
Because they're Shellfish.
An army of werewolves is known as a Fur-eign Legion.
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
A spider saw a car he liked at the dealership and decided to take it out for a spin.
What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
What do you call a buffet for sheep?
All you can bleat!
What do you call a small, two winged insect resembling a mosquito that likes to keep the peace?
A diplognat!
Why did the elephant start the stampede?
Because it wanted to be herd.
What did the dolphin do to the woman who was rude to it?
Flipper off!
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
What’s black and white and red all over?
A sunburned panda.
What is a dog’s favorite book?
Harry Paw-ter and the Sorcerer’s Bone.
What’s an elephant’s secret talent?
They’re great at multi-tusking.
After graduating from high school, crows go to caw-lleges for further studies.
Wolves love shopping and they can literally die for. However, none of them loves the flea market for obvious reasons!
Who granted the fish’s wish?
The fairy cod mother!
How do you ask a dinosaur to lunch? Tea Rex?
Do you know where you take a sick squid?
To the doctopus.
Where do you take a sick hornet?
To the waspital.
I just learned how to speak parrot.
I just learned how to speak parrot.
I heard someone broke out of prison using a sheep
I didn’t believe it until I saw the news and he was on the lamb.
What kind of bird always gets stuck in the nest? A velcrow.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
Q: How does a tiger stop a video?
A: By pressing paws.
Why was the UN concerned when the waiter dropped Thanksgiving dinner?
Because it meant the fall of turkey, the ruin of grease, and the breakup of china.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
What is most gorillas' favorite book to study in English class at high school?
The Apes Of Wrath.
Why did the giant ape climb up the side of the skyscraper?
Because the elevator was broken.
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
What sound do 8 sheep make?
Octo-bah.
Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.
Who dosent eat on Thanksgiving? A turkey because it is always stuffed.
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman?
The Man of Squeal.
What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse?
Call the marrier!
What did the duck eat for snack?
Salted Quackers.
All the girls I meet keep thinking I’m a sheep.
Every time they see me they say “Ewe”
What do you call a freezing bear?
A brrrrrrr.
How can a bear catch fish without a pole?
They use their bear hands.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
What kind of shoes do mice wear? Squeakers.
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
Because they dropped out of the school.
How do horses get to another star system? They travel through intergalloptic space.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment.
When you cross a wolf and Fred Astaire, you get dances with wolves.
What do you get if cross a frog with some mist?
Kermit the Fog.
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